Shaarei Teshuva, Shaar 1 Ikar 1

We'll take a look from the beginning of Shaarei Teshuva of Rabbenu Yonah.

ועתה בנשמות להיטיב השם יתברך וברוך להיטיב להם הדרך לעלות מתוך פחת מעשיהם ולנוס מפח פשעיהם.

Rabbenu Yonah depicts cheit as a pit and as a trap. What both of those metaphors convey is that there's nothing isolated or compartmentalized about a cheit, a person's behavior. When we chotei, it ensnares us. A person becomes ensnared by cheit. The cheit affects a person. The cheit creates momentum. The cheit is metamei. We make the mistake of thinking, okay, so a cheit is you parked at a fire hydrant and you take your chances and you get a ticket. Okay, so it's something that needs to be resolved as a hundred-dollar ticket which is outstanding. That's what Rabbenu Yonah is saying: no, there's nothing sort of self-contained or isolated or compartmentalized about the cheit. The cheit is something that ensnares the person. Lachtof nafsham mishachas, to save the souls from Gehennom, ולהשיב מעליהם אף השם. Teshuva is again, it's a tova. Middas Hadin doesn't, a strict Middas Hadin which isn't blended with a Middas Harachamim, which isn't tempered by a Middas Harachamim, doesn't allow for Teshuva. It's a tova.

ולמדם ולהזהירם לשוב אליו כי יחטאו לו ברוב טובו וישרו.

So not only does Hakadosh Baruch Hu provide the opportunity for Teshuva, but He makes it a mitzvah. Hakadosh Baruch Hu admonishes us that we should do Teshuva.

כי הוא ידע יצרנו שנאמר טוב וישר השם על כן יורה חטאים בדרך.

He shows the way to return.

ואם הרבו לפשוע ולמרוד ובגד בוגדים בגדו לא סגר בעדם דלתי תשובה. שנאמר שובו לה' אשר העמיקו סרה ונאמר שובו בנים שובבים ארפא משובותיכם.

I'm not sure, I don't know offhand whether Rabbenu Yonah here is taking sides on the major issue which engaged the Rishonim, whether Hakadosh Baruch Hu ever as an onesh, in even the most egregious cases, denies a person the possibility of Teshuva. Right, the Rambam, the Ramban kayadua understand that that's what ואני אקשה את לב פרעה means, that a person can, chas veshalom, forfeit this zechus of an opportunity of Teshuva. And other Rishonim say there is no such thing. Hakadosh Baruch Hu never ever does that. What does it mean ואני אקשה את לב פרעה? So there are different alternatives to what it might mean. One of them, for instance, is that Hakadosh Baruch Hu says I'm not going to let Paroh give in just out of his instinct for self-preservation. If he'll want to submit out of genuine Teshuva, so that door always remains open. Hakadosh Baruch Hu never closes that door. That that I'm not going to let him, that I'm not going to let him do. I don't know what Rabbeinu Yona with the v'heshivo l'shvo, does he mean to be taking a position on that?

והוסמנו על התשובה בכמה מקומות בתורה והתבאר כי התשובה מקובלת גם כי ישוב החוטא מרוב צרותיו כל שכן אם ישוב מיראת השם ואהבתו.

The Rav in one of the drashos which is summarized in Al HaTeshuva explains by dramatizing that we should appreciate this point. Says you have someone his whole life has been a miserable character, miserable character. Let's say you discover you had an employee for 50 years, 50 years you treated him beautifully this employee of yours and you paid him handsomely and you gave him good benefits and the six weeks of paid vacation a year and he's been on your payroll for 50 years and then you discover that he's been embezzling for the past 48 years, past 48 years. And then when the judge is about to pass sentence and the sentence he's going to get is going to keep him in jail until he until he dies, so all of a sudden he feels remorse and he and he apologizes. So who wouldn't be moved by such an apology? It doesn't mean anything. Okay, you don't feel you don't feel badly that you stole from me, you feel badly that you got caught and you're going to jail. So we wouldn't we wouldn't really be moved by such an apology. Hakadosh Baruch Hu is

והתבאר כי התשובה מקובלת גם כי ישוב החוטא מרוב צרותיו כל שכן אם ישוב מיראת השם ואהבתו שנאמר בצר לך ומצאוך כל הדברים האלה באחרית הימים ושבת עד השם אלוהיך ושמעת בקולו והתבאר בתורה כי יעזור השם לשבים כאשר אין יד טבעם משגת ויחדש בקרבם רוח טהורה להשיג מעלת אהבתו.

Rabbeinu Yona here has a very very fundamental idea. It's of tremendous importance both conceptually as well as practically. It's an idea that you find which parallels in different different contexts. For instance, in Mesillas Yesharim, when Ramchal talks about kedusha, so Ramchal says that the beginning of the process of attaining kedusha is sorry I forget the lashon is involves one's own intense effort, one's own hishtadlus, but sofo is matana. But the end of the process is a gift from Hakadosh Baruch Hu. De'hainu what Ramchal says is that the emes is that a person can't really attain kedusha on his own. A person can't attain kedusha on his own. I think I think you'll check it I think maybe even says that's pshat in the pasuk V'hiskadishtem V'heyissem Kedoshim. So why isn't that just simply repetitious? He says no, V'hiskadishtem means you'll make that effort. You'll you'll invest the the energy, the effort, you'll make the attempt and and you'll still you won't be there yet, you won't be there yet and I'm telling you that I I Hakadosh Baruch Hu says I will then supplement does as much as he can, which won't, which doesn't reach the goal, which doesn't, which can't attain the goal, and then Hakadosh Baruch Hu gives him the rest that the person becomes again just suffused, overflowing with Ahavas Hashem. And the reason this is so important not only conceptually, philosophically, but practically also is that sometimes a person looks at a task, at a goal and it just seems that it's unattainable, that it's just unrealistic. You just can't imagine how it's humanly possible to ever attain that goal. And because it seems that way to him, so then there's a natural impulse to be mitya'esh because why undertake a task, why endeavor to do that which clearly clearly seems that it's impossible. And that's why what Ramchal, what the Chovot HaLevavot and again in a minute so we'll just translate the words bli neder of something here, what Rabbeinu Yona is saying the same is that ein hachinami, takeh it is humanly impossible, but it is very much attainable because of this partnership. And that's really what Rabbeinu Yona says the emphasis about the teshuva process, right?

התבאר בתורה כי יעזור השם לשבים כאשר אין יד טבעם משגת

look at these two lines rabbosai.

התבאר בתורה כי יעזור השם לשבים כאשר אין יד טבעם משגת ויחדש בקרבו רוח טוב להשיג מעלת אהבתו.

It takeh may be true. When we look in the mirror it takeh may be true that the image looking back at us what I'm really going to be chozer betshuva sheleima and someday have Ahavas Hashem? So it takeh may be true that that impression that I have that it's humanly impossible may be right on target, may be right on the mark. אף על פי כן it doesn't mean that it won't be attainable.

ושבת עד השם אלהיך ושמעת בקלו ככל אשר אנכי מצוך היום אתה ובניך בכל לבבך ובכל נפשך ואמר בגוף ענין האומר השם אלהיך את לבבך ואת לבב זרעך

lehasig ahavaso lehasig ahavaso. So you see that Hakadosh Baruch Hu will remove the impediment.

ומל השם אלהיך את לבבך. הנביאים והכתובים דברו תמיד על דבר התשובה עד כי באו עקרי התשובה כלה מפרשים בדבריהם כאשר יתבאר אם אמרו רז"ל כל הנביאים כלם צוו על התשובה. ודע כי החוטא כאשר יתאחר לשוב מחטאתו יכבד עליו מאד ענשו בכל יום כי הוא יודע כי יצא הקצף עליו

veyesh lo manos a refuge lenashomo and the manos is the teshuva and he omed bemeredo and he's bera'aso and

ובידו לצאת מתוך האפיכה ולא יגע ממנה אף על פי כן מאד רעתו רבה ואמרו רז"ל על הענין הזה במדרש קהלת משל לכת של לסטים שחבשו בבית האסורים וחתרו מחתרת פרצו ויעבורו ונשאר אחד מהם פותר בית הסוהר ובמחתרת חתורה האיש ההוא עודנו עצור ויחבטהו במטהו אמר לו

kashai yom הלא המחתרת חתורה לפניך ובאיזה מהירות המלט על נפשך. So what Chazal have in mind with this mashal, I mean it often at first glance it strikes us differently, but what Chazal have in mind with this mashal of where the people are breaking out of jail and and one of them just doesn't take advantage of the opportunity. So again, so we in our law and order society, so we think of it, oh, aderaba, kol hakavod, yasher koach that he's not you know that he's not supposed to break out of jail. But what Chazal have in mind with the with the mashal is that it shows that that person is contemptuous of the king's ability to punish him. And it's as if the king is telling him "You know you're gonna I'm gonna punish you" and he's yeah and it doesn't make any impression on him. That's what the mashal is designed to to convey. That the one who doesn't take advantage of the of the tunnel to to break out of jail is is displaying just complete contempt for the fact that the the king is angry at him, the fact that the the king says that he's gonna that he's gonna punish him. It seems clear that the Rabbeinu Yonah holds that that when there is yedi'as hacheit that the chiyuv to do teshuvah is immediate. Right? That's what Rabbeinu Yonah says that that a person is not allowed to be mis'acher lashuv mechataso. The impression you have in the Rambam in Perek Beis of Hilchos Teshuvah is that the Rambam thinks that the Torah gives us some slack and the Torah gives us until Yom Kippur. And if a person is aware of cheit, rachmana litzlan, so then he has until until Yom HaKippurim to to be chozer b'teshuvah. The Rambam writes in Perek Beis that קץ מחילה וסליחה לישראל and therefore לפיכך חייבים הכל להתוודות ולעשות תשובה ביום הכפורים. And the impression you have is because it's the time when Hakadosh Baruch Hu is ready to be mechaper, is ready to be mochal v'solei'ach, so that's the deadline for teshuvah. And if you take a look, the Sefer HaChinuch says that meforash in in the mitzvah of hisvados, the mitzvah of teshuvah in Parshas Naso, he says meforash that that a person, rachmana litzlan, is guilty of bittul mitzvas asei of teshuvah if Yom HaKippurim comes and goes without his having done teshuvah. But the Rabbeinu Yonah, the impression you have from him is he thinks that it has to be it has to be immediate.

ולא ימצא איחור התשובה זולתי בעמי הארץ שהם ישנים שוכבים ולא ישיבו אל לבבם ולא דעת ותבונה להם למהר להימלט על נפשם.

Again, the the same imagery that the Rambam famously gives us when he darshens the remez of teki'as shofar, the imagery of going through life sleepwalking. Now, the imagery of sleep is is twofold. The imagery of sleep is that first of all when we're asleep we're we're just unaware of of so much that's going on around us. But also when we're asleep and we dream, so the dream seems very real. Right? And then when you wake up, so then it turns out that it didn't happen after all. That that in the dream it was was geshmak, right? A person thought he he he won the lottery. So so sleep is... a person can go through life sleepwalking, a. just being totally oblivious to everything that's important. And what's more, just as one who's dreaming thinks things are real that are not real, so there's all kinds of devarim gashmiyim, devarim ktantanim that that we think are real and they're they're nothing. Kachalom ya'uf.

ולא ימצא איחור התשובה זולתי בעמי הארץ שהם ישנים שוכבים ולא ישיבו אל לבבם ולא דעת ותבונה להם למהר להימלט על נפשם.

There's among... נידחים מעל השם ברוך הוא ולא יאמינו בעונש החטא. And so, it's not just that they're sleepwalking, it's worse. It's as basically there's this kefira in sechar ve'onesh.

ואמרו רבותינו ז"ל אם ראית תלמיד חכם שעבר עבירה בלילה אל תהרהר אחריו ביום כי באמת עשה תשובה. ועוד התבונן ברוע המאחר מן התשובה כי בעוצם.

Again, so point number one is the again contemptuousness that the lack of teshuva or procrastinating to do teshuva displays. Point number two in terms of the fallout or what's involved with procrastinating and doing teshuva:

ועוד התבונן ברוע המאחר מן התשובה כי בעוצם כי לולא התמהמה כי עתה שב ונענח במרירות לב ורגז ודאגה ודלפה עינו מתוגה כי יפגשהו יצרו שנית ויזדמן החטא לידו יכבוש את יצרו ויזכור אשר עבר עליו כוס המרירות ולא יוסיף לשתותה כמו שנאמר רגזו ואל תחטאו וביאורו רגזו והצטערו על אשר חטאתם ואל תחטאו עוד כי הזכרת חטא למעלה ואמרו תבקשו חטאו סלה.

Says Rabbeinu Yona, משל מה הדבר דומה. Sometimes if a person ich veis, let's say a person eats a certain food and then, I don't know, maybe maybe there was food poisoning or whatever there was, he, the person rachmana litzlan gets violently sick afterwards. So often, and this may or may not be rationally justifiable, but often in one's mind, so one associates the that that painful aftermath with the food. Again, sometimes it may not be rationally justifiable because sometimes, you know, if the fish, if the meat hadn't had the food poisoning so then it wouldn't have triggered that that reaction. But whether, whether it again, whether it makes sense rationally or not, but we have such reactions, right? So we associate that that particular food item with that very very intense sickness that that we had. And what happens is when you see the food you can't even think of eating it a second time. It's a psychological reaction that we have. Rabbeinu Yona says we would have that same psychological reaction, that same motion of recoiling would happen with regard to chet if we had gone through the teshuva process. And the teshuva process again is not a superficial process. It, the the anguish which is involved in acknowledging chet in its in its true magnitude, so that anguish is something that the the process is a painful one. And if the opportunity for chet, for the same chet would then present itself again, so we would have again that natural defense mechanism, that same natural reaction of whatever short-lived pleasure that this seems to this seems to offer, but I know what the aftermath is, I know what it what it results in. If a person hasn't gone through the teshuva process, so then he doesn't have that reaction, he didn't he didn't get sick from it. That's what Rabbeinu Yona says, the pshat in the pasuk of rigzu ve'al techeta'u is if rigzu, if you... measure in the future of al techeta'u. However,

כאשר יאחר ושב ובא החטא לידו יפול במוקשו כנפול בראשונה ויגדל עוונו האחרון מאוד ותעלה ובאשתה לפני השם.

So says Rabbeinu Yonah and what's more the second time rachmana litzlan the second time a person is chote so then that's a more serious offense rachmana litzlan than the first time. Why so?

כי מראש לא חשב כי פתאום יבוא היצר השודד עליו.

The first time a person is nichshal, okay, so he was caught unawares. He was caught unawares. A person didn't realize that he was susceptible to such and such. He didn't realize that he had such and such a weakness. He didn't realize that being put in such and such an environment, in such and such a situation, he didn't realize what a big nisayon it was and he wasn't ready for it. So there is, it doesn't exonerate him, but there is something mitigating about that. Ma she'ein kein if it happens once, so now a person knows. A person knows. He knows that he has that weakness. He knows that susceptibility. He knows what the nisyonos are in in his current situation.

אחרי אשר ראה דלות כוחו ואשר גבר יד יצרו עליו ועצם ממנו היה עליו לראות כי פרוע הוא.

He should have seen that he's exposed, that he's vulnerable. ולשית עצות בנפשו להוסיף בו יראת השם and he should have been strategizing how not to repeat the cheit. This is also, this line is also a very very important yesod that part of part of teshuvah, part of implementing the teshuvah lehaba is that a person has to strategize. A person can be 100%, as much as we ever do anything 100%, a person can be 100% sincere about a teshuvah that I'm not going to do it again and can have very genuine remorse about what happened and yet can fail to implement that teshuvah. And the reason for the failure is that a person has to strategize. How is it that I'm going to react differently? How is it that I'm going to deal with, so I was provoked and I got angry. So that keshe'be'atzmo is a cheit and then in my anger I said things that I shouldn't have said and that is חטאים על גבי חטא. Okay, so I feel terrible about it and I sincerely resolve not to do it again. Okay, what am I going to do to prevent that reaction? Mei'heicha teisei that that I'm going to react differently? There needs to be, a person needs to to to strategize. How is it that I'm, what what measures am I putting into place, what measures am I taking to see to it that I'll be able to implement the teshuvah?

לשית עצות בנפשו להוסיף בו יראת השם ולהקהיל פחדו אליו למשול בו ולהצילו ממרות יצרו להישמר מעוונו ואמר שלמה עליו השלום ככלב שב על קיאו כסיל שונה באוולתו וביאורו כי הכלב אוכל דברים נמאסים וכאשר יקיאם נמאסים יותר והוא שב עליהם לאוכלם

kein inyan haksil. And here the the omek that that Rabbeinu Yonah is telling us in that mashal, right? So Shlomo HaMelech says that the same way that the dog re-ingests its own vomit, so too a fool repeats his chataim. So so Rabbeinu Yonah says the mashal is not only that the fool repeats his chataim but what the mashal captures is that the same way when the dog ingests it the second time it's even more mo'as the second time because it's because he vomited it up, it was partially digested and then he vomited it, so it's more mo'as. was the second time so the chet Rachmana litzlan when we repeat it is is more ma'us.

באור כי הכלב אוכל דברים נמאסים וכאשר יקיאם נמאסים יותר ושב עליהם לאכלם כן ענין הכסיל כי יעשה מעשה מגונה וכאשר ישנה בו מגונה יותר כאשר בארנו.

Okay. So in procrastinating and doing teshuvah so again Rachmana litzlan it shows contemptuousness. In procrastinating to do teshuvah we deprive ourselves of what would prevent the repeat of the chet because if the first chet would have been something that there was tremendous anguish in uprooting, encountering, so then we would have been less likely to repeat the chet and then when the chet is repeated so again that's a that's a worse offense than the original offense because you don't have the mitigating factor of having been caught by surprise of having been unaware of that weakness, of that flaw, of that susceptibility. Now says Rabbeinu Yona moreover

והשנית כי השנה בחטא תשובתו קשה כי נעשה לו החטא כהיתר.

Once a person Rachmana litzlan repeats a chet, so Chazal say that when you he's about to quote a little bit later this paragraph that כיון שעבר אדם עבירה ושנה בה נעשית לו כהיתר which poses a

ובזה כבדה מאד חטאתו. כמו שנאמר הנה דברת ותעשי ותוכל. באור ותוכל כי הרעות נעשו לך כהיתר וכדבר שהוא ביכולתך וברשותך מלשון ותוכל לאכל בשעריך שתרגומו אית לך רשות. ואמרו רבותינו זכרונם לברכה כיון שעבר אדם עבירה ושנה בה נעשית לו כהיתר. ואמרו רבותינו זכרונם לברכה על האשה עבר עבירה ושנה בה כי כיון בעיניו יחשב לעשות עבירה ונהנה ולא עשה מחשבתו רעה מצטרפת למעשה ועליו נאמר הנה אנכי מביא רעה אל העם הזה פרי מחשבותם.

So there is a double problem again when Rachmana litzlan we repeat chet. First of all, when something becomes habitual so we all know it's much more difficult to break a habit than than it is to sort of nip something in the bud and prevent it from becoming a habit. Person does a chet once it's not it's not habitual. Person does a chet twice so sounds like the Rabbeinu Yona that the Gemara in Yevamos at the end of the sixth perek has a discussion whether or not chazaka is established with two times or or with three times. Sounds like what Rabbeinu Yona is telling us that Chazal tell us in this context already two times establishes somewhat of a chazaka in the sense that it already becomes somewhat habitual. It becomes somewhat habitual so that makes teshuvah more difficult for two reasons. A, the difficulty of doing teshuvah to break a habit is so much more difficult it's possible it's possible and we can and we shouldn't be mitya'esh from it but l'ma'aseh it is more difficult than than preventing a habit. And second of all when it's na'asis k'heter so a person gradually stops to think of it as a chet. He becomes so comfortable and it becomes so normalized that the person doesn't even begin to think of it as a chet anymore. We see it unfortunately in so many many areas but some of the areas which are most blatant is when when we walk into shul the the talking during davening the the coming late the leaving early everything is na'asis k'heter. There's no sense that that there's anything amiss in it. It's it's na'asis k'heter. Then there's the famous addendum of Rav Yisrael Salanter right Chazal say כיון שעבר אדם עבירה ושנה בה a person does a chet and repeats it's na'asis k'heter. So Rav Yisrael says and what happens the third time he does the chet? He says na'asis k'mitzvah. That's the that's the psychological dynamic.

ואתה בינה שמע זאת כי הוא עיקר גדול. אמת כי יש מן הצדיקים שנכשלים בחטא בפעמים כענין שנאמר כי אדם אין צדיק בארץ אשר יעשה טוב ולא יחטא. אכן כובשים את יצרם מאת פניהם ואם יפלו בחטא פעם אחת לא ישנו לו ולא. ונקוטו בפניהם וחוזרים בתשובה אך כל אשר אינו נזהר מחטא ידוע ואינו מקבל על נפשו להישמר ממנו גם אם הוא מעוונות הקלים ואף על פי שהוא נזהר מכל עבירה שבתורה קראו חכמי ישראל מומר לדבר אחד ואת פושעים נמנה

he's listed amongst poshim gadol avono minso. Even if a person just consistently neglects a single chet gadol avono minso. Why? Says Rabbeinu Yonah, just think about it.

כי אם יאמר העבד לרבו כל אשר תאמר אלי אעשה זולתי דבר אחד פשט או שבר עול אדוניו מעליו והישר בעיניו יעשה. ועל העניין הזה נאמר ארור אשר לא יקים את דברי התורה הזאת לעשות אותם בביאור אשר לא יקבל על נפשו לקיים כל דברי התורה מראש ועד סוף ויורה על זה אשר לא יקים לעשות בלשון הרמיה אשר לא יעשה.

Says Rabbeinu Yonah, when rachmana litzlan if we consistently, consistently neglect a particular mitzvah, we consistently, consistently are over a certain aveira to the point that it's nasah keheter etzlanu, there's no such thing as Hakadosh Baruch Hu that you have to listen to the majority of what Hakadosh Baruch Hu says. קבלת עול מלכות שמים and kabbalas ol mitzvos has to be a hundred percent. There's no there's no that ninety-five percent is very good and is very, very impressive. By definition, it's not a קבלת עול מלכות שמים. It's not a kabbalas ol mitzvos unless it's a hundred percent. When we, when we chotei, again, accidentally, okay, so that zeh chet and we need to deal with it. But when there's a mitzvah rachmana litzlan which is not on the radar screen, so then that that basically refutes, it refutes our krias shema every day. Doing a chet rachmana litzlan doesn't refute our krias shema. But if a chet is not on the radar screen, so then that does. ועוד תדע רבנו יונה says

כי השונה עבירה אחת עשר פעמים אף על פי שנזהר מכל שאר העבירות הנה הוא נחשב הנה הוא נחשב כעובר על עבירות חלוקות וכן אמרו רבותינו זכרונם לברכה כמאן דאמר לנזיר אל תשתה והוא שותה אל תשתה והוא שותה לוקה באחרונה כל אחד כמשפט האוכל טריפה בהמה טמאה וחלב ודם.

We shouldn't think that that ten repetitions of the same aveira is less significant than ten different aveiros. No, al pi halacha it's like that also. If for every revi'is yayin that a nazir eats, if you give him another hasra'ah, give him another hasra'ah, he gets another set of malkus. וראו ראינו כי רבו עוונות הדור הזאת. He says, and in Rabbeinu Yonah talking about his generation, he says there are many avonos takeh which are not on the radar screen rachmana litzlan.

כי יש אנשים הרבה מקבל על נפשו להיזהר מעבירות ידועות וכל ימי חייהם אינם נכשלים בהם אבל הן אצלם כהיתר ואילו היו נוהגים כן רק על עבירה אחת חולי רע בנפשם כאשר בארנו.

If there's a single aveira which isn't on the on the radar screen, it's already gevaldik, it's already a terrible sickness.

אף כי נוהגים על עשרות רבות בהנה מן החמורות כמו שנאת חינם והקלת חבירו עצמו בשם והזכרת שם שמים לבטלה במקום שאינו טהור או בידיים לא נקיות והעלמת עין מן העני ולשון הרע ושנאת חינם וגאוות הלב ונתנה חיתתו

unnecessarily intimidating people if a person's in a position to do so,

והסתכל בעריות וביטול תלמוד תורה כנגד כולם ורבות כאלה כתבנו מקצתם אצל בני הדור להזכירם ולהזהירם. וכן ראוי לכל בעל תשובה

Rabbeinu Yonah says we also must be doing the following:

וכן ראוי לכל בעל תשובה לכתוב במגילת ספר הדברים שנכשלו בהם והמצוות שקצרו בקיומם.

Everyone should have a private diary that no one else ever sees, where a person tracks, where he catalogs the rachmana litzlan lo sa'asehs that he has violated, the aseis that he's been deficient in. and being mekayeim ולקרא בספר זכרונותם בכל יום. And the way to again ensure that we'll be poised not to repeat the cheit is to review that diary daily. והנה במדרגות רבות לתשובה. The different levels to teshuvah.

ואלה דברים שאין להם שיעור. ולפי המדרגות יתקרב האדם אל הקדוש ברוך הוא.

And according to the higher the madreigah of teshuvah, so obviously the closer it brings a person to HaKadosh Baruch Hu. ואמנם לכל תשובה תמצא סליחה. Selichah is the least common denominator of all teshuvos.

אך לא תטהר הנפש טוהר שלם להיות עוונותיה כלא היו. זולתי כאשר יטהר אדם את לבו ויכין את רוחו כאשר יתבאר.

So the Rav has a lot about this in Al HaTeshuvah also, how cheit is something which is mechayeiv a person, but it's also metamei a person. A person can have kapparah which addresses his accountability, which addresses his liability, which protects him from punishment, but it doesn't necessarily mean that it purifies the person. It doesn't necessarily mean that the stain on the neshamah has been cleansed. The Rav says this in various contexts. One of the contexts in which he says it is Rebbe's shittah is that Yom Kippur is mechapeir afilu leshe'eino shav. Afilu leshe'eino shav. So Rav says ein hachi nami because Rebbe says that since kapparah is given to the klal collectively, so a person can takke just grab onto the koteil of the klal and he can attain kapparah even without teshuvah, but taharah there's no such thing. Taharah even Rebbe, obviously we don't pasken like Rebbe, but even Rebbe agrees that taharah, the purity which teshuvah can afford, that is no such thing as happening without the person again exerting himself.

זולתי כאשר יטהר אדם את לבו ויכין את רוחו כאשר יתבאר. וכן כתוב אשרי אדם לא יחשוב ה' לו עוון ואין ברוחו רמיה. וכעניין הבגד הצריך כיבוס.

And he uses the mashal of laundering a stained garment.

כי המלבן הכיבוס לא יועיל בו להעביר הגאות ממנו אך לפי רוב הכיבוס יתלבן.

If you have a stain which is embedded, so a little bit of superficial washing is not going to get it out. וכן כתוב הרבה כבסני מעווני. There needs to be harbeh, it needs to be a lot of laundering for the person to be cleansed from the stain of the sin.

ותכבס הנפש מן העוון כפי אשר תכבס את לבה. שנאמר כבסי מרע לבך ירושלים. ואמרו רבותינו ז"ל אשרי איש ירא את ה' בעודו איש. רצה לומר כי תשובת האדם המעולה בימי בחורותיו בעוד כוחו עליו ויתגבר יצרו. אכן כל תשובה מועילה כמה שנאמר תשב אנוש עד דכא ותאמר שובו בני אדם. ואמרו רבותינו ז"ל עד דכדוכה של נפש.

And we'll maybe next Thursday we'll continue with Im Yirtzeh Hashem the ikkarim of teshuvah.