Teshuva: Reframing the Past and Changing its Future Reverberations

In terms of what we said we'd pick up in section bet page ninety-two. This is the most difficult part of our Ish Hahalacha. We're not going to do it justice but we'll try to understand a little bit Be'ezrat Hashem.

הלכה מכנסת ובאה הנשמה בכל פסקיה והוד ההוד ומצות התשובה ויסוד ההשגחה והנבואה והבחירה.

In the previous sections, the Rav spoke about how Halacha in terms of its cumulative effect, in the aggregate, is designed for Yetzirah. And that's what we said as long as we view it only atomistically, we don't see that dimension at all and here the Rav is saying, yes, but again today we're trying to talk a little bit about Teshuvah Be'ezrat Hashem. About Teshuvah, so here in this Mitzvah itself, the idea of Yetzirah is paramount. So not only in the aggregate, but here again even when you compartmentalize and hone in just on Teshuvah, so the idea of Yetzirah is paramount. תשובה על פי השקפת ההלכה היא פעולת יצירה yetzirah atzmit self-creation הפקעת הזהות הפסיכית והאנוכית שמקודם suspending the earlier psychic identity veyetzirat anochi chadash creating a new I baal todaah chadashah different awareness, a new awareness.

רוח ולב חדשים מגמות ושאיפות אחרות כמהות וערגות שונות זוהי תשובה המורכבת מחרטה על העבר וקבלה על להבא. כל מצות עשה ולא תעשה שבתורה אם עבר אדם על אחת מהן בין בזדון בין בשגגה כשיעשה תשובה וישוב מחטאו חייב להתודות לפני הקל ברוך הוא שנאמר והתודו את חטאתם אשר עשו זה וידוי דברים.

Is that a misprint? Asher chata aleha is the Pasuk in Vayikra? Maybe that's a misprint. והתודו אשר חטא עליה. It's a misprint. Asher chata aleha. Asher chata aleha.

וכן כל מחויבי מיתות בית דין ומחויבי מלקות אין מתכפר להן במיתתן או בלקייתן עד שיעשו תשובה ויתודו וכן החובל בחברו והמזיק ממונו אף על פי ששילם לו מה שחייב לו אין מתכפר לו עד שיתודה וישוב מלעשות כזה לעולם. מצד אחד סובר

the Rambam

כי וידוי דברים מעכב אינו מתכפר עד שיתודה וישוב. מצד השני אמר בקידושין על מנת שאני צדיק גמור אפילו רשע גמור.

v'hakeidush lishmeiya teshuva b'da'ata וכן נפסקה הלכה זו b'Hilchos Ishus הרי שאין וידוי מעכב v'ha'ikar teshuva levad daivei וסתירה זו צריכה עיון Omnam

שני דינים נפרדים ושני יסודות שונים נאמרו בשם תשובה בכללותה

the effect that that teshuva has Alef בתור הפקעת חלות שם רשע it changes the person's status Beis בתור כפרה כמו שכתוב מכפר as a source of atonement

קרבן יום הכיפורים ייסורים מיתה וכיוצא בהם וידוי מעכב בכללות כפרה הכתובה במעשה התשובה אבל לא בדין הפקעת שם רשע אם אחד יעבור לאו שיש בו מלקות או כרת ומיתת בית דין ויפסל לעדות אין צורך לשם כשרותו והכשר לעדות בוידוי דברים אלא במעשה תשובה גרידא התלוי בחרטה ובקבלה כמבואר בברייתא ובהלכות עדות לרבינו כל מי שנתחייב וכו' והרי הן פסולים עד שיוודע שחזרו בהן מדרכן הרע מאימתי חזרו מלומן בריבית משיקראו שטרותיהן מעצמן מאימתי חזרו המשחקים בקוביא משישברו פסיפסיהן וכו' מאימתי חזרו סוחרי שביעית משיגיע שביעית ויבדקו אין הכשר העד כרוך בוידוי דברים כי הלא הפקעת שם רשע אינה קשורה כלל עם מושג כפרה בכללותה אלא עם מעשה התשובה עצמו חרטה וקבלה ועצם התשובה אינה זקוקה לוידוי דברים.

The fact that that one can speak of teshuva without kapara which is what which is what emerges from the teretz the apparent stira highlights the fact that and and what teshuva means as distinct from something which is an instrument of kapara is the change that's brought about in the person so that that illustrates the rav's yesod in in terms of in terms of teshuva as as an act of of self-creation. The pashut says I don't know whether the rav's going to say this or not the pashut says but you wouldn't have known it otherwise Hashta de'atinan lehachi and once we have this clear proof that the teshuva it's not simply that that it acts as an instrument whereby a person attains kapara but teshuva again as illustrated by the fact that the hafka'as shem rasha happens even without kapara teshuva is a way of effecting change in the person again the rav says and that complete change is an act of self-creation. Hashta de'atinan lehachi the pashut says that the second din of kapara also is a result of that the kapara also comes from the from that change in the person. But you wouldn't have known that you couldn't have just you know asserted that you know that that's what kapara depends upon Meiheichi taysai I don't know maybe kapara is just no that's the midos harachamim the midos harachamim are a heichal kapara Hashta de'atinan lehachi that you see that before you before the person is even ready to be misvadeh there was already the hafka'as shem rasha the that change that he's brought about in himself so then the simple pshat now in kapara becomes that that with the addition of vidui for whatever reason the Torah insists upon that with the addition of vidui so then as a result of the the change in the person so that's also the basis for for attaining kapara

רק החלק השני של התשובה שמכוון כלפי הכפרה תלוי בוידוי דברים שכן קראה התורה לוידוי כפרת דברים כל תעודתו של הוידוי מוגבלת בתחום התשובה המכפרת ואינו חודר לרשות התשובה המפקיעה שם רשע.

You know, Viduy is not necessary to affect that change.

הפקעת שעבוד שהוא העיקר הראשון של תשובה היא פעולת שינוי העצמיות והאישיות.

Again, change of the very, very person and personality. Yetzirat Atzmiyut, the self, the creation of a new self,

עצמיות חדשה של האדם. פעולה זו באה על ידי החלטת הרצון הגמורה והכרעת הדעת הכבירה. ומה היא התשובה שיעזוב החוטא חטאו ויסירנו ממחשבתו ויגמור בלבו שלא יעשהו עוד וכן ינחם על שעבר ויעיד עליו יודע תעלומות שלא ישוב לזה החטא לעולם וצריך להתוודות בשפתיו ולומר עניינים אלו שגמר בלבו.

Azivat Hachet, Kabalah Le'atid, Vecharatah Al He'avar הפקעת שם רשע שחל בגברא Umafsikah to interrupt Et Hemshechiyuto Haruchanit, the spiritual continuity, Umeshanot Et Zehuto and they alter his identity.

ויודע תעלומות מעיד על היצירה הזו. הוידוי בשפתיו בא לשם כפרה גרידא. ברם מושג הכפרה הוא רק טפל לעיקר התשובה שהוא הפקעת שם רשע וביטולו.

The primary element of Teshuvah is that self-change. The truth is that unlike the way the Rambam presents it in Sefer Hamitzvot, in Hilchot Teshuvah in the Yad, the Rambam doesn't have Bakashat Mechilah, סלח לנו מחל לנו כפר לנו as part of Teshuvah. That explicit, maybe it's hinted at in the Lashon of Onah by the Viduy. כיצד מתוודה אומר אנא השם, maybe the Onah is implicit but the Rambam doesn't even explicitly list as Bakashat Mechilah. Rav Saadia Gaon does. When Rav Saadia Gaon lists the four elements of Teshuvah, so Bakashat Mechilah is one of the four. The Rambam in Sefer Hamitzvot also has it.

והמצוה הע\"ג היא שציוונו להתוודות על החטאים והעונות שחטאנו לפני הקל יתעלה ולומר אותם עם התשובה וזהו הוידוי וכוונתו שיאמר אנא השם חטאתי עויתי פשעתי ועשיתי כך וכך ויאריך במאמר ויבקש מחילה בזה העניין לפי צחות לשונו.

But in the Yad he doesn't repeat it. He doesn't list that as, again, the Halachah that the Rav is referring to here of Umah Hi Hateshuvah. The Rambam very conspicuously does not mention that, which only serves to highlight the point that the Rav is making that the fact that Teshuvah is also an instrument for Kaparah, the fact that Teshuvah is also an instrument for Mechilah Uselichah, that's a albeit very, very welcome byproduct, but it's a byproduct of Teshuvah. It's not what the essence of the Teshuvah is. essence of the teshuva is is the change in the in the person.

והמושג של הכפרה הוא רק טפל לעיקר התשובה והוא הפקעת שם הרשע וביטולו. בדרכי התשובה וכולו משנה שמו כלומר אני אחר ואיני אותו איש שעשה אותם המעשים.

We have osan hama'asim. האחריות הרוחנית והשונות האישית, this, this being different spiritually,

שנוצרות על ידי התשובה מהוות את מהותה ותוכנה של זו.

That's what, that constitutes, that comprises the essence of teshuva.

התשובה כובשת את חוק הזהות וההמשכיות השולט בהוויה הנפשית על ידי פלא היצירה וכוחה שנמסרו לאדם. כשאדם שב הרי הוא נעשה לבורא עולמות וליוצר עצמו ואנוכיותו.

So this, the Rav's about to elaborate what this means that the teshuva conquers as it were the law of continuity.

וכן מופיע ההבדל העיקרי בין מושג התשובה בהלכה לזה של איש הדת הכללי.

Ze ha'acharon, the latter, תופס את רעיון התשובה מבחינת כפרה. Again, teshuva is, the definition of teshuva is an instrument of atonement. בתור תריס בפני העונש, it shields against punishment. U-betor charatat srak, an ilan srak is a tree that doesn't bear fruit. So here too the charata is is one that doesn't yield anything שאינה יוצרת ומחדשת כלום. It's a type of appeal for commutation or amnesty. That's what teshuva is. It's an appeal, again, to have one's sentence commuted to and or to be given amnesty. Let's say if a person's sentence is commuted so he still has a, he still has a criminal record, right? You still have, it's still on the books that he, that he robbed a bank or whatever, but he doesn't have to, he doesn't have to serve the time. נפשו הוגה נכאים ומתאבלת על יום אתמול כי עבר. The the sadness, the the grief is for something that's in the past

ששקעה כבר בתהום הנשייה על מעשים שחלפו כצל על עובדות שאי אפשר לשנותן ולהמירן באחרות.

Teshuva solely as understood solely as an instrument for kappara, as a way of being given amnesty or commutation, means that the person, again, he's full of regret for the past that cannot be undone. U-lefichach zakuk hu

זקוק הוא לחסדים מרובים לנסים ונפלאות לרחמים רבים. מה שאין כן איש ההלכה הוא איננו מתמכר לבכי ולתוגה.

Now the same halacha that the Rav quoted earlier about shinnuy hashem that אני אותו איש שעשה אותן המעשים, so in that same פרק ב' הלכה ד', so the Rambam writes

מדרכי התשובה להיות השב צועק תמיד לפני ה' בבכי ובתחנונים.

So I don't think this line is intended to sort of diverge from the Rambam. So what does it mean? When the Rambam is describing midarkei hateshuva, how long does the darkei hateshuva last in the Rambam? He doesn't tell us, right? Let's say a person is goleh mimkomo, so what does it mean forever? He never returns home. The Rambam doesn't give us a time frame for the midarkei hateshuva that he's describing in פרק ב' הלכה ד', but the peshat is, again, it clearly conceives of tchuva as a lifestyle rather than a moment, rather than an isolated moment. But me'idach gisa, it's hard to imagine that let's say in the stories that we know about tzaddikim who parshu galut, they didn't parshu galut the whole life. They parshu galut for however long a period they did. They parshu galut doesn't mean that they never return home. So the Rambam is talking about that bechi in a bechi in a delimited sense as part of the tchuva process. What the Rav is rejecting when he says הוא איננו מתמכר לבכי ולתוגה, it means a bechi not which is part of a mode of how the person is crying out to Hakadosh Baruch Hu, but a bechi sort of which becomes almost permanent. That's what the lashon mitmaker means, to be totally given over to something. That's why, the same way when something is sold, not in the hitpa'el, so a stam mechira is not leshloshim yom. There is such a thing, but a stam mechira is not leshloshim yom. It means to be totally given over to something. Let's say sometimes you meet people and their whole lives they regret a certain decision that they made, some opportunity that they had and didn't take advantage of, or a certain decision that they made, and they're sort of stuck in the past. That's what the Rav is describing when he's dismissing that type. Again, the part of the tchuva involves bechi, okay, so that's part of the for a person to change himself and his attitude. So that's part of the experience is that anguish. But the permanent bechi, that that is generated again by the עובדות שאי אפשר לשנותן ולהמירן באחרות, and that is what the halacha doesn't know of. הוא אינו עוסק בתשובת המשקל ואינו מתמכר, he doesn't give himself over, לסיגופי הגוף ועינוי הנפש. Ish ha-halacha עסוק ביצירה עצמית ובבריאת אנוכי חדש. He's with the things begin to get very I don't know abstract. אינו מתחרט על העבר שכבר אף ונעלם. He's not regretting a past that has flown away and disappeared, אלא בעבר הקיים, but a past that is still adayin, that still exists, והמשתלב והנכנס לתוך ההווה והעתיד, and that exists in the present and the future. אינו לוחם בצללים המציצים מן העבר המת, he's not struggling with with shadows of a dead past, ואינו מתאבק עם מעשים שכבר קמשו ונבלו, that have withered. אין קבלתו לעתיד ערטילאית. On the other hand, his kabbalato le'atid is not a artila'it—he means a person without clothing, unclothed.

אין קבלתו לעתיד ערטילאית ביחס לעתיד רחוק וסתום שלא בא עדיין לעולם. איש ההלכה מעוניין בבבואת העבר המשתקפת במרכזם של חייו בהווה השואנים והגועשים קיים נרגש ובעתיד הפועם והתוסס שכבר נברא. יש עבר חי ויש עבר מת. יש עתיד שלא נוצר עדיין ויש עתיד הקיים כבר. יש עבר ועתיד שאינם קשורים זה בזה ובהווה אלא על ידי חוק הסיבתיות,

causality. הסיבה נמצאת בנקודת זמן אחת מצטרפת על המסובב, the effect. Sibah is cause, mesovev is the effect,

המעובר בנקודה ב' וכן כל כיוצא בהם. ברם הזמן עצמו בתור עבר מופיע בבחינת היה אין ואת העבר אין, ובתור עתיד בבחינת יהיה עדיין והעתיד עדיין.

The Rav is rejecting that. ומנקודת מבט זו אין התשובה אלא מושג ריק ונבוב, navuv lachuta sat. Then from that perspective, teshuvah is something empty and hollow.

אי אפשר להתחרט על עבר שכבר מת ושקע בתהום הנשייה.

I mean you can be mitcharet, but it doesn't do anything. Right? You know the phrase in English, there's no point in crying over spilled milk. You know it doesn't do anything. The Rav is not saying that you can't, I mean you can, but the point is you can't do it productively.

ואין מחליטים ביחס אל עתיד שלא נולד עדיין, ויפה התקלסו מבחינה זו שפינוזה וניטשה באידיאה של תשובה.

So what what does the Rav mean when he talks about again and continues this for the next couple of pages about a past that still exists, about a future that already exists, and it's that element of the past and that element of the future which teshuvah relates to? What does he mean a past that that still exists and and a future that that already exists? I think the simplest, maybe not the fullest, but the simplest is as follows. It doesn't require any explanation to understand you know how we think of the past as no longer here behind us. Right? But on the other hand, obviously the past reverberates into the present. משל מה הדבר דומה. Let's say a person spent the past two years studying French and invested a lot of time in that. So today in the present he knows how to read and speak French fluently. So why is that? Because there's something about the past that reverberates into the into the future. Let's say you have someone who's I don't know some super gifted athlete and they tell him you know if only he'll train with discipline and dedication someday you know there's no question he'll he'll win a gold medal in the in the Olympics. So on the one hand you know it's a halom nevuah it's adayin but on the other hand that vision you know if he accepts it as something that you know with the with the certitude that he's told so that's a vision that is already exists in the sense that it already impacts him in the present. Right? It motivates him to to train with that discipline and and dedication. So in in one sense and on one level so the past is alive the past exists in the present in terms of that what we've done in the past reverberates it it exerts an influence. Again take the example of a person today he he speaks French by virtue of the past. So that past is not lost it didn't disappear without a trace it it continues it lingers in the present. Okay. Now clearly on on a physical level you know a a person cannot touch the past a person cannot change the past. But on a religious and spiritual and even psychological level a person can change the past because if a person will reframe what happened in the past that will change the influence that it has on the person in the present. So let let's say a person was nichshal in in a particular chet or chata'im in the past. As long as he doesn't engage in teshuvah so the effect that the past has on the present maybe the those chata'im you know are are more attractive to the person. Maybe those chata'im weigh him down in the present. Maybe there's an element of again of addiction of נעשה לו כהיתר וכולי. When a person does teshuvah so now he reframes what happened. Again the fact of did he do chet A B or C did he eat neveilah he ate neveilah. That on on that level you know teshuvah doesn't go into the past and and change what happened no time is is unidirectional the way the way we think. Before we start yesodei hatorah that that remains true. So did but if when he thinks to the past so that you know he doesn't you know he doesn't savor the taste of the of the neveilah that he ate but he now thinks back to that experience as of look what happens to a person when he's not mitgaber on the yetzer hara. Or he looks back on on that experience as you know as as being traumatic because of the because it distances him distanced him from from from Hashem. So then the effect that that act has on him moving forward is totally changed, is redirected. Do you hear that, Rav Yosef? And since the way the past spills over into the present and lingers in the present is by its influence on the person, when a person reframes the past, so then he redirects its influence. You know, a lot of, like, a person, I don't know, so in his youth, so he did all kinds of things which were really wild. So at the time, I don't know, so at the time that was sort of the height of, I don't know, enjoyment and whatever else. And as long as that's the way it lingers into the present, so then he still wants to do it, it shapes his identity in the present. When the person looks back on that as chatos neurim, looks back on that as foolish, crazy behavior, so then awareness of, again, how easily a person can fall off the madrega of being human to acting in a way that's not consistent with being human, so then that has a different hashpacha on him now. So in that sense, he changes the past. That's what it means on its simplest level. When the Rebbe, again on page ninety-five, יש עבר חי יש עבר מת, again we're not claiming that you can't, you know, that everything about the past is changed, the facticity of the past does not change. You know, if again, if a person ate neveila, he ate neveila. You know, it's not as if, you know, that physical act of consuming that piece of meat didn't happen because a person changes the past. It did happen. But what that represents in terms of moving forward, in terms of right now and the future, which is, and it's in that dimension that the past still exists, so that a person can change and does change because when he reframes that action, when he relates to it differently, so then he changes the past in the sense of the way the past impacts the present and the future. And the same is true in terms of the future existing already, is again, when you think of again, the actual events of the future which haven't happened yet, so they haven't happened yet. Again, in terms of what will be the facticity of the future, so that hasn't happened yet and doesn't exist. In terms of the chazon, the vision of the future, the impact it can have on a person today, that can be very real. In that sense, we're talking about a future that's already inhering and impacting upon the person. So what the Rebbe is coming back to on page ninety-two, when seemingly the Rebbe is just very prosaically repeating in the paragraph תשובה על פי השקפת הלכה, the second paragraph here under Ot Base, and then it concludes with

זו היא תשובה המורכבת מחרטה על העבר וקבלה על הבא.

Okay, so at this stage he's just repeating devarim yeduim from Rav Saadia from Rambam. But the peshat that the Rebbe's going to say in it is the reason teshuvah is comprised of charatah on the past and kabbalah al haba is because that's the way the person changes the past and brings to bear the future on the present. And that's the omek that he says in charatah and kabbalah la-ba. That it's not just stam kedei charatah, you should regret the past and kabbalah is you should make a decision about the future is no, you should for the person to change himself since who a person is since the future does already inhere and impact upon the present and since the past reverberates into and affects the present so the way the person changes himself now he has to relate to past and future. And that's the omek of charatah and kabbalah la-ba. That's what the Rebbe says towards the bottom of ninety-six and the fifth line from the bottom עיקר העיקרים של מהות התשובה הוא כי העתיד ירדה, right, v'dubar, to rule over, ירדה בעבר וישלוט בו שלטון בלי מצרים. The significance of the past, the way the past affects a person moving forward is something which teshuvah says that the present and the future instead of the present and the future being mechanistically dictated by the past, so the present and the future aderaba they determine what the influence will be of the past moving forward. That's what this line says. So a teenager takes with or without his parents' permission the car and goes joyriding and gets into an accident and so when he does teshuvah and feels the sense of anguish for the recklessness and for the anguish that it caused his parents so then that action will now make him a more responsible and more devoted son moving forward. So the again the reframing of what happened redirects the influence that the past has on the present and the future and then the past this crazy reckless act becomes something which exerts the most positive of influences on the person and that's what the Rebbe quotes from Resh Lakish גדולה תשובה שזדונות נעשו לו כזכויות. But how does that happen? How do you change what happened? Again you don't change the facticity of what happened like he did go joyriding you don't change that fact but in terms of what that fact represents and how it impacts the person and how it reverberates and how it lingers into the present. and affects the future, so that one does retroactively redefine and thereby redirect, and that's on a simple level, that's what it means that the past is alive, and the teshuva touches the past, and changes the past, and transforms the past.