Teshuva MeYirah in Rambam

I didn't have time to review this. I don't think I... trying to put it a bit more clearly, a bit more clearly somehow. We didn't have a chance to review this. Just finally, I just wanted one point in Inyanei Teshuvah and then we'll pick up this here tomorrow briefly and also in Inyanei Teshuvah. I think Shiur is supposed to be the first thing in the morning tomorrow at 8:15 on the original schedule, something like that. The Gemara in Yoma famously identifies two types of Teshuvah, Teshuvah miyirah, Teshuvah meiahava. The Rambam never uses those terms. The Rambam never quotes that terminology from Chazal, Teshuvah miyirah, Teshuvah meiahava. Okay, so maybe he has his own vocabulary. Itachen b'devarim b'go, Devarim b'go. First of all, the pashus is that Teshuvah miyirah, Teshuvah meiahava is not that Chazal are giving us some special insight into Teshuvah. In general, avodas Hashem, there's a mode of avoda miyirah, there's a mode of avoda meiahava. The Rambam takeh does talk about that in the beginning of perek yud of Hilchos Teshuvah, that if a person is motivated by כדי שאזכה לחיי העולם הבא or rachmana litzlan

שלא יכרת מחיי העולם הבא. אל יאמר אדם הרי אני עושה מצות התורה ועוסק בחכמתה כדי שאקבל הברכות הכתובות בתורה או כדי שאזכה לחיי העולם הבא ואפרוש מן העבירות שהזהירה תורה מהן כדי שאנצל מן הקללות הכתובות בתורה או כדי שלא אכרת מחיי העולם הבא אין ראוי לעבוד את השם על דרך זה

she'zeh oved miyirah. And rather a person should be oved meiahava. So the emes is it's not that Chazal are telling us something singular and meyuchad that they're giving us some special insight into Teshuvah. In general, in avodas Hashem, there's a bechina of yirah, there's a bechina of ahava. So the same way you can put on tefillin in the morning, you can put it on miyirah, that you don't want to get in trouble for the bital hamitzvah, you want the schar hamitzvah, or you can put on tefillin in the morning עושה אמת מפני שהוא אמת וסוף הטובה לבוא בכלל. So the same thing applies to Teshuvah. So there's no reason we should... the same way in every other context we don't find in Hilchos Tefillin that the Rambam tells us this tefillin miyirah and tefillin meiahava and there's lulav miyirah and lulav meiahava and there's matzah miyirah and there's matzah meiahava. So l'eipakcha that we should expect to find that in Hilchos Teshuvah. It's nothing meyuchad to Teshuvah about that distinction. It's just an application of a universal all-encompassing distinction within avodas Hashem. It just so happens the Gemara in Yoma needs it to reconcile a stirah whether or not זדונות נעשו לו כשגגות or whether זדונות נעשו לו כזכויות. But itachen, and again, regardless of whether or not this is true in the Rambam, kimdumeh that this is true and it's very very important for us to understand. The emes is that itachen that when we talk about Teshuvah, the Rambam bedavka doesn't want to label a Teshuvah miyirah... because the associations that we have with avoda miyira, which is

אין ראוי לעבוד את השם על דרך זה שהעובד על דרך זה הוא עובד מיראה ואינה מעלת הנביאים ומעלת החכמים,

that doesn't apply to teshuva. A teshuva miyira is, is what the right words are, teshuva miyira is much more welcome. Teshuva miyira is, is, is much more basic and much more fundamental than, than avoda miyira in general. So the question is like this: right? Rabbeinu Yona highlights, others as well, the chiddush that Hakadosh Baruch Hu accepts a teshuva miyira, that Hakadosh Baruch Hu accepts a teshuva from tzaros and, and yissurim. What, what's our reaction to that? The reason we see it as a chiddush is משל למה הדבר דומה. Someone was just convicted of some terrible crime and he's pleading with a judge that the judge should give him a light sentence and he expresses his remorse. So what's our reaction? Our reaction is that the only reason he's remorseful is he's remorseful about the jail time that he's about to, that he's about to get. He's not really, if he could've gotten away with it, if he could've gotten away with murder, he wouldn't be remorseful. Lemayseh he got caught, so therefore he's remorseful. So how much is that remorse worth? So when a person does teshuva mitoch yissurim, it's mamash the same. When he does teshuva miyira, it's, he's afraid he's going to get caught. So it's almost the same. Hakadosh Baruch Hu accepts it. Hakadosh Baruch Hu accepts it. So how, how can we understand that, that midda of Hakadosh Baruch Hu? Listen to this svara. It follows from what we were discussing in Shaarei Teshuva the other day. The ikkar of the cheit, the ikkar of the cheit, right, we, we read in Rabbeinu Yona, איך לא היה פחד אלוקים לנגד עינינו? Right? When, when we read there the ikkar of charata. How could it be that, that I didn't have yiras shamayim, I didn't have yiras haromemus? And again by the ikkar hashishi of busha, היות השם יתברך רחוק מכליותינו. The ikkar of cheit is no yiras Hashem, no awareness of Hakadosh Baruch Hu. That's the ikkar of cheit. A teshuva miyira, so what does a teshuva miyira do? A teshuva miyira, it puts Hakadosh Baruch Hu back where He's supposed to be front and center. Yeah, ein hachi nami, there is a higher madrega, but here, you can't, you can't sort of level, levy the same criticism, as it were, of putting on tefillin miyira the way you would a teshuva miyira. Because here the essence of teshuva, like the Rambam says in gimmel daled, in beis aleph, is zichru bor'achem, is zechor bor'acha. And a teshuva miyira does that. That's what the ikkar of teshuva is. The most important breakthrough in doing teshuva is that the reason we chotei in the first place is איך לא היה פחד אלוקים לנגד עינינו, is היות השם יתברך רחוק מכליותינו. That's why we chotei in the first place. And a teshuva miyira addresses that, addresses that. This is not the context in which to be underscoring the fact, oh, but he was only motivated by yira, he wasn't motivated by ahava, and that's not ma'alas hanevi'im, and that's not ma'alas hachachamim. When it comes to teshuva, the ikkar of the teshuva is the zichru bor'achem. A teshuva miyira accomplishes that, accomplishes that in a major, major way. So bedavka again, it's not a kasha why the Gemara has it. The Gemara is meyashev a stira, right? What's the effect of teshuva on aveiros? Keshgagos or kizchuyos? So the answer is it depends. But to label teshuva miyira and then to have the same association of ein ra'ui, teshuva miyira is in a different class than avodas Hashem in general miyira. Because here, where the essence of the mitzvah consists of the zichru bor'achem, so teshuva miyira does that. Teshuva miyira does that in a very big and, and important and fundamental way and perhaps... itachen, again, the idea kemedumeh is certainly true, certainly that that's the outlook we're supposed to have on a teshuva me'ahava. And itachen that for that reason the Rambam doesn't want to use those terms, because otherwise the sort of critical associations that we have with avoda mi-yira would carry over, and they don't belong here by teshuva, they don't, they don't belong here by teshuva. Okay, so b'li neder tomorrow we'll do im yirtzeh hashem b'li neder at 9:15 the halachos of teshuva, not sure whether the Rambam or whatever or inyanei teshuva.