Pirkei Avos 2:1 continued

The Mishna that we left off with last night, so at the bottom source, let's see what it says: Mishneh Torah, Hilchot De'ot.
דעות הרבה יש לכל אחד ואחד דעות הרבה יש לכל אחד ואחד מבני אדם וזו משונה מזו
You know, what about Rav Kook's first wife? So the way the shidduch came about was, in the days before there was electricity, so Friday night, if you couldn't, like, have candles, you're not allowed to read le'or haneir on Shabbos. So if you wanted to learn on Friday night, you needed to know ahead of time, you needed to know ba'al peh. So the story is that the Aderet, the Aderet who was Rav Kook's father-in-law, came to the rosh yeshiva to look for a shidduch for his daughter. And he went into the beit midrash at night, it was pitch black, and he hears someone sitting and learning, beautiful voice, beautiful melody, and he's learning daf after daf of Gemara. And he's just fluently, slowly, slowly. And, you know, he quietly found out who that was. Turns out that was Rav Kook, and and that's how that's how the shidduch came about. So the light goes out, people can continue, right? Okay. דעות הרבה יש לכל אחד ואחד Maybe they'll get a shidduch out of it. You never know, maybe they'll get a shidduch out of it also.
דעות הרבה יש לכל אחד ואחד מבני אדם וזו משונה מזו ורחוקה ממנה ביותר
There are many different types of middot for a person, and each one is different than the next. יש אדם שהוא בעל חמה כועס תמיד There is a person that is angry constantly. ויש אדם שדעתו מיושבת עליו ואינו כועס כלל And there is a guy that doesn't get angry at all. Ve'im yich'as, because he's so composed. Da'ato meyushevet alav. He's unflappable, because his composure is eino ko'eis kelal. Ve'im yich'as, and if he gets angry, יכעס כעס מעט בכמה שנים. He gets angry very little in many years. Once a once once in a yovel, right? Once every several years, you'll see a little bit of anger. ויש אדם שהוא בעל לב יותר And there is someone that has a big heart. Haughty. Very haughty, right? Heart? It's haughty. It's haughty? Look at the two sheets, go to the two sheets. ויש שהוא שפל רוח ביותר And there is someone that's very humble.
ויש שהוא בעל תאוה לא תשבע נפשו מהלוך אחר תאוה
There's a guy that's a ba'al ta'avah, and he can't satisfy his soul.
ויש שהוא בעל לב טהור מאד ולא יתאוה אפילו לדברים מעטים שהגוף צריך להם
And there is someone that has a pure heart that doesn't desire anything, even what the guf needs. So the Rambam is is is describing the ends of the spectrum, right? Really the extremes. Someone who's someone who's so wrathful, he's always getting angry; someone who's so composed that almost nothing can get a get a rise out of him; someone who's who's very arrogant, someone who's so humble; someone who is a hedonist, someone who practically is an ascetic. Go ahead. Veyesh ba'al nefesh...
יש בעל נפש רחבה שלא תשבע נפשו מכל ממון העולם
And there is someone that won't satisfy himself with all with all the money of the world, כענין שנאמר אוהב כסף לא ישבע כסף, like it says, if he loves money he won't be satisfied with money.
ויש מקצר נפשו שדיו אפילו דבר מועט שלא יספיק לו ולא ירדוף להשיג כל צרכו
And there is someone that is has enough with a little bit that he doesn't So little that it doesn't even, shelo yaspik lo, doesn't even cover his basic expenses, and he's totally disinterested in in in in acquiring more money. Veyesh...
ויש שהוא מסגף עצמו ברעב וקובץ על ידו ואינו אוכל פרוטה משלו אלא בצער גדול
There is someone who starves himself and only eats a little bit In pain. There is such a type, right? People can't spend money. Even if they have a lot of money, they can't spend money. Not from Not only don't they spend money on other people, they don't spend money on themselves either. So he has money, but but he can't can't bring himself to to spend it. And because of that, he he tortures himself with hunger. He doesn't he doesn't buy enough food. ויש שהוא מאבד כל ממונו בידו לדעתו And there are some people that lose all their money Squander it, yeah, and Two years later they're broke. One sec. One sec, people.
ובדרך אלו שאר כל הדעות כגון מהולל ואונן וכילי ושוע ואכזרי ורחמן.
Hold on, maholal is someone who's lightheaded, frivolous. Onen is someone who's sad, morose. Kilai veshua, again, stingy and generous, but to an extreme. Achzari verachman, cruel, insensitive, and bleeding heart, right? Rachmanus to an extreme. רך לבב ואמיץ לב, cowardice and recklessness, vechaytzei bahem. Let's continue. Halacha... top of the second side, shtei ketzavot?
שתי קצוות הרחוקות זו מזו שבכל דעה ודעה אינן דרך טובה, ואין ראוי לו לאדם ללכת בהן ולא ללמדן לעצמו.
These two extremes of this spectrum that each and every mida that has is not the correct way to do things, and it's not proper for somebody to to live his life like this and to to teach himself to to do to to do to do these. Good. So now now continue to halacha dalet? No, we didn't finish.
והדרך הישרה היא מדה בינונית שבכל דעה ודעה מכל הדעות שיש לו לאדם.
The correct path that somebody should live by is the middle, the middle path, the mida habeinonit. And for each and every mida that has it has from from from each and every mida that has it has this in the middle path.
והיא הדרך שהיא רחוקה משתי הקצוות ריחוק שוה, ואינה קרובה לא לזו ולא לזו.
So what is the mida habeinonit? That's the one, that's the that the mida that's right, that's the furthest from both of the two sides. Meaning it's equidistant, it's equidistant from from both extremes, right? Rechok shaveh, right? Rechoka rechok shaveh, it's it's equidistant from the from the two extremes.
אינה קרובה לא לזו ולא לזו. לפיכך צוו חכמים הראשונים שיהא אדם, שיהא אדם שם דעותיו תמיד, ומשער אותן ומכוין אותן בדרך האמצעית, כדי שיהא שלם בגופו.
What does it mean to be sham de'otav? What does it mean sham de'otav? Shuma, shuma is an appraisal, often used to appraise in a in a in a fiscal sense. Here it means to assess his character traits. So, שיהא אדם שם דעותיו תמיד, he's constantly assessing, appraising his de'ot, his character traits, umesha'er otam, and calibrating them, umechaven otam, and directing them, baderech ha'emtza'it. Keytzad? לא יהא בעל חמה נוח לכעוס. So he shouldn't be somebody who gets really mad, and it's easy for him, he's he's easily provoked. ולא כמת שאינו מרגיש, אלא בינוני. I mean, ולא כמת שאינו מרגיש, אלא בינוני. And he shouldn't be like a a person that doesn't feel anything. He should be in the middle.
לא יכעוס אלא על דבר גדול שראוי לכעוס עליו, כדי שלא יעשה כיוצא בו פעם אחרת.
And he should only get mad on something very big, where it's it's proper for him to be mad about it, so that he doesn't do something similar at a different time, get mad unnecessarily.
וכן לא יתאוה אלא לדברים שהגוף צריך להן, ואי אפשר לחיות בזולתן.
And he should also only desire things that the body actually needs for them, and it would be impossible for it to exist without them. כענין שנאמר: צדיק אוכל לשובע נפשו. Like the pasuk says in Mishlei, that a tzaddik eats to satiate his soul, and not his body. Vechen lo yehei... Not sure that that's what it means. It means lesova nafsho means he he doesn't under-eat, he doesn't overeat. He doesn't deprive himself, but he doesn't, he doesn't, he doesn't go to to the opposite extreme either. He eats to to be full so that he can function at maximum capacity. Nefesh doesn't always mean soul, you know. Sometimes it does, but not always.
וכן לא יהא עמל בעסקו אלא להשיג, אלא להשיג דבר שצריך לו לחיי שעה, כענין שנאמר: טוב מעט לצדיק.
And similarly, he shouldn't he shouldn't do do do something, he should only do something to that that he needs for for that that particular moment. Like the pasuk says, tov me'at latzaddik, good is a little bit for the tzaddik. ולא יקפוץ ידו ביותר. And he shouldn't have a He shouldn't have a lot and a lot of things. He shouldn't be too stingy, right? Yikpotz yado yoser means to to to really to clench his hands. He shouldn't be stingy, he shouldn't be stingy in the sense of not giving tzedakah, but on the other hand, velo yefazer mamono. He shouldn't be like spreading it out, giving off too much. He shouldn't he shouldn't squander his money by just by just giving it all away. Ela?
אלא נותן צדקה כפי מסת ידו ומלוה כראוי למי שצריך.
He should give tzedakah to to to according to his ability, and he should loan it out to whoever.
ולא יהא בהול וצועק, ולא יתעצב ויתאונן, אלא שמח כל ימיו בנחת ובסבר פנים יפות.
So he shouldn't be bahul, like sad, I guess? Bahul is light-headed, frivolous. Frivolous. Vetzo'ek? Frivolous, yeah. And not sad, and he shouldn't complain or be an onen? Not exactly the same thing, but in the same ballpark. Oh, but he should be happy kol yamav with nachas, and he should be besever panim yafot. Vechein shear de'ot. So you can look at both sides. So from from from I'm I'm looking at So the middah beinonit, to what areas of life does the does this middah beinonit apply? To which areas of life? Every area? All areas of life. If if a person wants to know, right, we didn't just read it now, but we read it the other night, apropos the Mishnah of כל המרבה דברים מביא חטא. If a person wants to know how much to talk, so what should guide him? The middah beinonit. A person wants to know how much money is he looking to earn, middah beinonit. If a person wants to know how to go about his diet, what foods he should eat, how much he should eat, so what guides him? The the middah beinonit. If a person wants to know how to modulate his emotions in reacting to situations, whether should he be empathetic, should he should he be quick to to anger, so what guides him? The middah beinonit is it touches on every area of life, right? It touches on on every area of life. That's what we were suggesting yesterday. Again, if you go back, again this is what we said quickly at the end of last night's lecture. If you go back and compare this with what the Rambam does in Hilchot Teshuvah. Let's see. Chapter two? Chapter two, halachah four. Chapter two, halachah four? Perek bet, halachah dalet. It's chapter two, halachah four. Chapter two, halachah four, yeah. Yeah, in Hilchot Teshuvah, he goes far beyond that. He says that Right here. Right here. Right here. So, midarkei hateshuvah, it's gotta be to cry to Hashem, in crying, and personal prayers, and deeds. Well, it's not deeds, it's tzedakah. Tzedakah is Tzedakah, to give To give tzedakah as he's able to. And he's gotta be very far away from whatever sin that he did. Right, he stays very far from Meshaneh shemo. Meshaneh shemo, he changes his name. Kelomar ani Kelomar ani acher ve'eini oto oto ha'ish. He changes his name to say, I'm not the same person that was before who was doing who was doing those terrible things. Umeshaneh ma'asav, he changes his actions. כולן לטובה ולדרך ישרה. He changes all to good to good good actions, upright path. So this is what we were coming to yesterday, right? So the Rambam says in Hilchot Teshuvah that a person should upgrade everything that he does. Everything he does. So we said, at first glance, as as noble a thought as that is, it it seems impractical to the point of being impossible. How's a person going to be mindful of so many different things, and and and to to that that that that to improve, to improve across the board? But here's the, and and seemingly, you know, if you look at the Rambam, you know, that's what he's saying. But here's an an important klal. The Rambam intended Mishneh Torah should be learned, not the way we learn. The way we learn Mishneh Torah is we learn Gemara, and then we have the the Ein Mishpat in the upper corner, right? The Ein Mishpat, and the Ein Mishpat gives you the the reference to where you can look up the halachah in the Rambam. That's how we use the Rambam. So we learn the Gemara, and then the Ein Mishpat tells us where where to go. The Rambam intended that Mishneh Torah should be learned consecutively. You should begin Hilchot Mishneh Torah, and keep going until you finish Hilchos Melachim. He also intended that we should memorize it. He says in his hakdama leSefer HaMitzvos, he says, I'm going to break Mishneh Torah down, excuse me, into units of halachos, because that's a more manageable unit to memorize. So when the Rambam, the point is when you get to Hilchos Teshuva, Hilchos Teshuva is after Hilchos De'os. So the Rambam, when we're learning Hilchos Teshuva, the Rambam is assuming that we've learned Hilchos De'os. If you look at Hilchos De'os, so when the Rambam says משנה מעשיו כולם לטובה or ulederech yesharah, so those are not just, you know, sort of, you know, just plain words, they're they're they're rich in association. What's the association of letovah ulederech yesharah? Take a look on the top of the second side, which is the, which is halacha gimmel in perek aleph of Hilchos De'os. The Rambam says, שתי הקצוות הרחוקות זו מזו, the two extremes, sheb'chol de'ah vede'ah, einan derech tovah, right? The the extremes are not a derech tovah. What is the derech tovah? What is tovah? The middle. And the, the other way we refer to middle is halacha daled: derech hayesharah. So when, so when the, when we're learning Hilchos Teshuva, so the Rambam intends when he says משנה מעשיו כולם לטובה ולדרך ישרה, it's not just, if we just translate that as, you know, change your actions for the better, for the good, and for the derech yesharah, and and there's no association, we're we're missing the Rambam's point. And what the Rambam, b'koreh, intends is that we should associate this with Hilchos De'os, and that what he is telling us is, oh, the key to improving in every area of life is just to be mindful of is my behavior being is is it conforming to the middas habeinonis or not? The way I'm treating people, am I am I being hyper in in greeting them? Am I being too, I don't know, too too lightheaded? Am I too understated? Am I being too withdrawn? Am I giving tzedakah, am I giving too much? Am I giving too little? It's all the same principle. So if a person is mindful of this one principle, it it it touches upon every single area of life. It's, it's a wonder. And that's what the Rambam means by משנה מעשיו כולם לטובה ולדרך ישרה, right? And that's what derech yesharah, the Rambam thinks Chazal used the term that way already. That's what Rebbi omer, איזו היא דרך ישרה שיבור לו האדם. Doesn't it sound at the end of that halacha in Hilchos Teshuva, that when he said that that galus causes him to be a sh'fal ru'ach, doesn't that sound like talking about the extremes? That being being sh'fal ru'ach, the Rambam in Hilchos De'os is saying the contrary? Yes, that's a that's a fantastic question, and it's sort of, you might have it here in a different context. There is a If you take a look, there is a a famous, famous stira in the Rambam that that people have been working on for 800 years to figure out. In in in the first sheet we used tonight, in in halacha aleph in Hilchos De'os, so when the Rambam illustrates extremes, as you said, sh'fal ru'ach beyoser is is mentioned as an extreme, and and then he says, and and that's not what we're supposed to do, right? Now if you take a look at the second sheet tonight, which is erroneously printed Beis Aleph, but it's really Beis Yud. You have that second sheet? Take a look on side two of that second sheet where it says Hilchos De'os Beis Gimmel. You want to read this, Beis Gimmel? You have it? Yes, please.
ויש דעות שאסור לו לאדם לנהוג בהן לנהוג בהן בבינונית אלא יתרחק מן הקצה האחד עד הקצה האחר.
There are certain midos that a person is, it's it's not allowed even to be a beinoni, to be, to be in the in the middle path, but a person has to distance himself. There are two exceptions to the rule, the Rambam says. This rule that I've been telling you about the middle path is has two exceptions. What's the first? V'hu govah haleiv, the first exception is ga'avah,
שאין דרך הטובה שיהא אדם ענו בלבד אלא שיהיה שפל רוח ותהיה רוחו נמוכה מאד.
Not only is it not proper for a person to be to be humble, modest, but he should be extreme, extremely shfal ruach, all all the way to the extreme. Right, so basically the question that you ask, correctly, from Teshuvah beis daled to alef vov, you have the same problem within Hilchos Deios between hei and zayin. I don't know, that's not answering your kashya, but but your question is correct, and and it's a shaylah what the Rambam in alef vov has in mind. But what he says in in Teshuvah beis daled is consistent with this. Okay, right. Now, yeah, but maybe let's go to the the the other sheet. The other sheet that has in on the margin on top beis yud and beis yud beis. You see that on the left side? Yes? Okay, so who's who's reading perek beis, mishnah yud? Beis yud, please. Everyone has the the the the one which is entitled which says beis aleph on top, which shouldn't say beis aleph on top? Not to confuse with the one that says beis aleph on top which should say beis aleph on top. Okay. Hey, I must shut the door. Mishnah, perek beis, perek beis, mishnah yud, let's see what it says. Rebbe Eliezer omer, says, יהי כבוד חברך חביב עליך כשלך, you should give as much honor to your friend like you're hon- like you give to yourself. ואל תהי נוח לכעוס. Don't don't be easily angered, right? Don't be easily angered. ושוב יום אחד לפני מיתתך. Return one- and and do teshuvah the day before your death. Okay, we we we tonight I don't think we're going to get beyond the first, יהי כבוד חברך חביב עליך כשלך. Let's jump to perek beis, mishnah yud beis, please. Rebbe Yosi omer, יהי ממון חברך חביב עליך כשלך. Should value your friend's money the way you value your own money? More. What does it say? יהי ממון חברך חביב עליך כשלך, it means it should be, yeah, as dear to you as yours is, right? Yehi, it should be, mamon chaveircha... The In in English, so we always place the subject before the verb, right? Right? I didn't say, \"Place we the subject before the verb,\" I said, \"We place the subject before the verb,\" right? We put the the subject before the verb. We place, right? We, subject, place, verb. We place the subject be- before the verb. In lashon hakodesh, often, not always, but in lashon hakodesh often the word sequence is is is is inverted, and in lashon hakodesh often you'll have the the verb before the the the the subject. So, yehi mamon chaveircha, mamon chaveircha, the money of your friend should be chaviv, dear, alecha, to you, k'shelach, as your own. Right, you should be as careful with someone else's money as as you'd be with with your own. You should be as as mindful of someone else's property not not to damage it as you would be of your own. Okay. So mishnah yud talks about יהי כבוד חברך חביב עליך כשלך, how do you translate that? How does it say yehi chvod chaveircha, how does it translate that? Right, the honor, the dignity of your friend should be, again, as dear to you. You should be as concerned with it as you are with your own, and perek beis, mishnah yud beis. Now, underneath that, underneath that, you you'll, I don't know if you're ready yet, you have to an ophthalmologist for for eye checkups? No, you don't do that yet. You go, if anyone has glasses, go, right? So so you go down, he tells you to read the first line, right? Second line, third line, because this is this is the way it is, right? So first you have the easy ones, and then the ones that you, assuming you've got new glasses for. Okay, now, I want to see if you can, you know, if you can read Vav Gimmel, and yeah, that that's the next bottom line on the on on the chart, you know, right? Okay. All right, Vav Alef Gimmel. How does this begin? Please, thank you.
מצוה על כל אדם לאהוב את כל אחד ואחד מישראל כגופו.
What does that mean? It's a mitzvah for everybody to love, like, everyone, every every Jew like like himself. שנאמר ואהבת לרעך כמוך. Very good. Good. Yourself.
לפיכך צריך לספר בשבחו ולחוס על ממונו כאשר הוא שם על ממון עצמו—Ka'asher
hu chas—חס על ממון עצמו ורוצה בכבוד עצמו. Therefore, So so the Rambam, Rambam tells us the mitzvah, ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha, and then how many applications does the Rambam have of ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha? How does it translate? How many ways does the Rambam translate it? Three? Three? Two? Two. How many? Wait, did you count miskabeid? Yeah. You know that's not so different than than the kavod, right? Cause kavod is is the, you know, the antithesis of being careful with kavod, right? Let's call it two. Well, let's leave that miskabeid on the side for now, and ולחוס על לספר בשבחו ולחוס על ממונו, look at that person with the horn. He forgot it. But but what what is lesaper beshivcho? You compliment someone, right? You compliment someone. So what does that accomplish? You compliment someone, you whatever area of life, what does that accomplish? Shows like you look at him in that way and it gives him kavod. So you're upholding the person's dignity, right? You're upholding his dignity. By by by telling, \"Oh, you know, good, you know you're an accomplished person,\" you're upholding his dignity. So the Rambam translates ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha in two ways. Right? He translates ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha in terms of being concerned with every other Jew's dignity, every other Jew's honor, and one way to be concerned with another person's honor and dignity is to, not to flatter him, but to compliment him as as appropriate. And B, the Rambam says the other way ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha translates is to be careful with someone else's money. To be as concerned with with his money as with your own. So the Kesef Mishneh says, where did the Rambam get the idea that ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha, I mean it seems like such a sweeping mandate, right? Ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha seems to be something which is just so broad and inclusive, and the Rambam translates it for dafka these two areas, right, of kavod and mamon. So says the Kesef Mishneh, where did the Rambam get that from? Where does it say in the Kesef Mishneh? Right underneath there, Kesef Mishneh, what does it say? Perek Beis. You see, that's these two mishnayos of Rabbi Elazar and Rabbi Yose. When they say k'shelach, they're saying no, this is this is a primary way, or one of the primary ways that ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha translates. Good? Okay, so so far, so so far we have again, כבוד חביב עליך כשלך and ממון חביב עליך כשלך. Be concerned with another person's honor, his dignity, that he shouldn't be ashamed, but on the contrary, he should feel that that that that his honor is being upheld, that his dignity is being upheld, and you should be careful with someone else's money as as with as with your own. If if he sends you to the store and asks you to pick up half a gallon of orange juice, and if you were buying the half gallon of orange juice, you'd see, \"Well, which brand is on sale this week?\" You know, the one that's on sale this week, I'll I'll I'll save myself a dollar if I buy that brand. So when you're spending someone else's money, so you should be as concerned with with getting the the brand of orange juice that's on sale as if you were spending your own money. Great. Okay, now. Okay, so good. Now let's take a look in Halachah Hey, though, which is right underneath Kesef Mishneh, you see? Right? You see Hilchos Eivel? Who's reading? פרק יד הלכה א, who's reading? Okay, thank you. What book is it in Rambam? I'm sorry? What is it? It deals with aveilus, the laws of mourning. The laws of mourning. Is it the same? Eivel means the same thing as aveilus. It's it's the abstract noun. Avel is the You know what concrete and abstract nouns are, right, Wilson? Yeah. A mourner is a concrete noun because it it refers to a person, it denotes a person, right? A person who's mourning, so that's a concrete noun because it's not it's it's a person or a thing. An abstract noun is an idea. So mourning, m-o-u, right, not m-o-r, mourning is is an idea, so that's called an abstract noun. A mourner, a person who's mourning, that's not an idea, it's a place or a it's a person, place, or thing, so that's a a a concrete noun. So eivel is is the same as aveilus, it's the abstract noun of of the of the halachos of mourning. Okay, says the Rambam, what does se'udas havra'ah mean? Condolence meal. Excellent. And to take out the dead, and to escort the dead. Good. And to accompany the bride. Good. And to escort guests. Hotza'as hameis means to take the meis out for burial, right? The the sort of the imagery is that that maybe that, you know, the meis dies at home, and hotza'as hameis means to take the meis out from the home to the to the cemetery to to bury him. But but yet part of it is is again the the procession. So hotza'as hameis refers to the procession from the meis's home to the to the cemetery. Ulehachnis Why why do we use the idiom hachnasas kallah? Sort of the the Chassan and kallah. Right, exactly, because the chassan and kallah get married under the chuppah. So to escort the the kallah to to the chuppah is described as hachnasas kallah, literally to bring her in to the bring her in, bring her in to the chuppah where the where the wedding happens. Ule ulelavos What does that mean? Escort the guest. Excellent. Right, it's a mitzvah if you have a guest to escort the guest when when he leaves. So most people will will just walk, let's say, daled amos outside of their front door, they'll walk with the with with with with the guest. You know, if really that that I mean if the situation warrants, you know, so the mitzvah is to make sure that they're not getting lost, and to and and to guide them wherever they that that they need to go. So usually in our situations, you know, they're walking a few blocks or whatever, and they know where to go. So we, in that in that kind of situation, so we'll fulfill this mitzvah of being melaveh the orei'ach, we'll we'll accompany him, you know, daled amos, six to eight feet outside of our house. And to attend to all the needs of the burial. And to be preoccupied with everything that's involved with kevurah. Now if really instead of a period here or a comma, I can't see what that is. What is that? A period. Yeah, instead of a period, should really be a colon here. Laseis, what what are the tzorchei kevurah? Laseis To carry it on one's shoulders. Literally to carry the meis on one's shoulders. Right, that that's why wh- when when possible, you know, even though nowadays they have these, what do they call them, like trolleys, whatever, to place Hearse? The the hearse is when you drive is when you're driving. And and then when you when when you get to the cemetery, so let's say to when they have to go from the the road in the cemetery to to where the to where the the grave is, so they have Gurney? Stretcher? What's the English word for it? You know, they have this metal frame on wheels A cart. Say a cart, thank you, that you can wheel it. But if at all possible, the mitzvah is to actually carry it, right? That's what it says, laseis al hakaseif. It's more of a kvod hameis to to to carry it. Veleilech lefanav To walk before him, to eulogize, and to dig. To eulogize, lachpor to dig, to the grave, and velikovro to bury the meis. Okay, now we continue. Now you can have a comma. וכן לשמח הכלה והחתן, which is the primary way we do that is by we dance at the wedding, participate in simchas chosson vekallah also. Ulesadam, ulesadam bechol tzorcheihem means to feast them. And, oh, and so seudah means meal, right? But what what else does, seudah definitely means meal, that's correct, but what does it mean, what what else does sa'ad mean? To assist. Right, to assist them bechol tzorcheihem. When a chosson and kallah get married, so they they need to set up a household. So to to assist them in in all their needs. Ve'eilu hein, all of these activities enumerated above, eilu hein אלו הן גמילות חסדים שבגופו שאין להם שיעור. There's no shiur. Af al pi שכל אלו המצות מדבריהם. Even though I identified each of these as discrete mitzvos mi'derabbanan, because all of them mi'divreihem, etc., aval hein הרי הן בכלל ואהבת לרעך כמוך, שכל הדברים. So, hold on, maybe let's just finish reading, and then your question is excellent, but we'll just hold off just one minute with that question. So the Rambam says all of the above is really subsumed under what? V'ahavta l'rei'acha kamocha. Because what does v'ahavta l'rei'acha kamocha mean? Kol, you see, do you have the last line here in the Rambam?
כל הדברים שאתה רוצה שיעשו אותם לך אחרים, עשה אתה אותן לאחיך בתורה ובמצות.
Right. And what you want other people to do for you, do it for your brother. If you're getting married, or you're marrying off a child, so you want people to come. You want people to come to dance, you want the the simcha is is much greater when you have many people than than than if you just have the the chosson and kallah, and the parents, and and that's it. So you're not going to have the same level of simcha as when other people join in the simcha. So the same way, if you're getting married or you're marrying off a a child, you want people to come. If, rachmana litzlan, a person is sick, you appreciate it if people visit. And an orei'ach appreciates the hospitality. He appreciates the fact that that if he's not sure of the way home, or or so the so his host walks him out to the main street to to make sure that that he's that he's on track for getting home. So anything that you want people to do for you, you should do for others. Okay. So there's a glaring question here, no, sir? Which hopefully we'll get to answer tonight, because the next shiur is after Tisha B'Av, and I don't know how you're going to live with this question for two weeks. What what's the glaring question here? The contradiction is that, in that, and he should have said that, like that, that what ahavas Yisrael is, is that everything that you want, that you want that others should do to you, to come to you, whatever, and then you want to do for others, that you should do Torah and mitzvos for them, which fine, that's, but before, when we learned this, it's not about that, it's more about that you should care about that person, care about their money, and Aha! Look at the difference between Hilchos De'os and Hilchos Avel. In in Hilchos De'os, when when we finished learning the halacha in Hilchos De'os about ahavas Yisrael, so what applications do we think the mitzvah has? Kavod, that's it. There's no, not the slightest hint that there's anything more to ahavas Yisrael than A, being concerned with everyone else's dignity, and B, being being concerned with with their money. There's not not the slightest hint that there's anything else involved in that mitzvah. In Hilchos Avel, the Rambam says what we would expect, what we what we generally think of ahavas Yisrael, right? Right? Right? Do unto others as as you would have them do unto you. So why in Hilchos De'os did did did the Rambam give us such an incomplete presentation of ahavas Yisrael? And why did why did he hold off all the way till Hilchos Aveil to tell us just how broad and and how inclusive the mitzvah really is? Ever everyone hear that question? Let's take a minute to think and then we'll we'll try to try to figure this out be'ezras Hashem. You want to say? Instead of asking why is why are we why Hilchos Aveil, it's more like a question of wait, if it's marrying hachnasas kallah with the mitzvah of burying someone, and also similar to like why is one okay. So you're right that that sort of so to speak a chassan and kallah and and burying someone are sort of opposite ends of the life cycle. But but they're the same mitzvah of ahavas Yisrael, right? In the same way, yeah, when you get married you expect people to, you know, to come and dance, and God forbid whatever, someone passes away, you know, nobody wants to die, but it's ahavas Yisrael, so then you have to, the kavod of the meis. A person's time, you know, it's a kavod not to be buried? Of course not. It's a, the meis's best interests is kavod hameis. So a person wants that other people should be, you know, after his time is done, a person wants that other people should should bury him, so it's the same mitzvah of ahavas Yisrael, which answers your second question, that the Rambam sort of segues to other applications of ahavas Yisrael from nichum aveilim, which is the subject matter of Hilchos Aveil. Very good. Okay, but what we want to know is, why the Rambam seemingly gives us such a incomplete description of ahavas Yisrael in Hilchos De'os? Maybe because the chessed that someone can do for for a meis is a total, is chessed shel emes because you don't expect anything back in return. So, yes, the mitzvah of, it's not, you're doing chessed for a meis and you're you're escorting the meis, so you don't expect anything back. So maybe, it's explaining that ahavas Yisrael doesn't mean that I'll do something for someone else so that they can do the same for me, but that we always should just look for how can I be altruistic and don't No, so the point is excellent. That it's not about reciprocity, the point is excellent. But still, why leave us in Hilchos De'os with such a seemingly misleading impression, right? Could you answer that in Hilchos De'os the Rambam gives you categories. The categories, what bein adam lachaveiro are the categories of of of kavod, the categories of ahavah. In Hilchos Aveil he's giving you one example, he's giving you an examples of of certain applications of ahavas Yisrael. For example, chessed shel emes, which is the ultimate kavod you can give to somebody is by escorting them through all the preparations for kevurah and a meis. And kavod kallah and chatan and again it's kavod and and it's a it's a it's a extreme level of kavod you have for someone else at the at the highest moment of simchah, where you're lifting somebody up and you're helping them and you're, you know, you fight to dance with them, it's an example within a broader categories of ahavas Yisrael. I guess. But all of this is really a person's kavod. But when when but I I hear that and and that's a very interesting suggestion. But when you when you learn perek vav of Hilchos De'os, when the Rambam says לפיכך צריך לספר בשבחו In the second halacha, the Rambam is being very careful to tell us it's miderabbanan over, like, twice, he says it twice, and that, that originally me'ikar hadin, this is how we understand ahavah, and then we give examples of it. It's true. Okay, so let's talk about that for a minute. What What At the end of the day, everything listed in Yud Daled, Alef of Hilchos Aveil, is it derabbanan or de'oraisa? Well, on the one hand, yes, he said מצות עשה של דבריהם. On the other hand, he concludes הרי הן בכלל ואהבת לרעך כמוך. So which is it? So, the simple pshat is the following. The simple pshat is the following: the Rambam means all of this is part of the de'oraisa of ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha. That's what he says: הרי הן בכלל ואהבת לרעך כמוך. Now, in what sense then is it derabbanan? It's derabbanan in the sense that they're different and discrete mitzvos. Min haTorah, what mitzvah is bikur cholim? There's not a mitzvah of bikur cholim, it's a mitzvah of ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha. What mitzvah is nichum aveilim? It's a mitzvah of ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha. What mitzvah is hotza'as hameis? It's a mitzvah of ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha. Miderabbanan, they're separate, distinct mitzvos. Now, lemai nafka mina that they're separate, distinct mitzvos? So maybe that once you make them separate, distinct mitzvos, you can then ask, \"Well, what should I do if I have a choice between bikur cholim and nichum aveilim?\" I I only have I have I I only, by the time I get home from work, there's only an hour left when people are still awake, and I have one neighbor who, rachmana litzlan, is sick, so I can go for bikur cholim, and another neighbor, rachmana litzlan, who is sitting shiva, so I can go for nichum aveilim. Now, once they're different mitzvos miderabbanan, there might be a hierarchy. But within de'oraisa, lav davka there's any hierarchy. So I don't know that they're only derabbanan. At the end of the day, they are de'oraisa. Okay, here, yes. Can you say maybe ahavah is a harder thing to define, you say the the baseline is kavod and mamon, but really it's a like it's part of the nefesh as well? And you have to like once you understand that part Interesting. Interesting. Maybe Hilchos Aveil is if you do it, you're being mekayeim ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha, but it's not required. In the in the Rambam, Hilchos De'os, is it I don't really ever see how it's just The Rambam specifically kind of make it seem like there's a klal, a mitzvah for adam that is to act for act for himself, you know, kavod and mamon like the self, and then if you have that they offer you you gave examples of how we fulfill that, are בשבחו ולחוס על ממונו. And that's the way you're saying it, but, but if you read the Rambam, try to look at Hilchos De'os again. What does it say? He's trying to know what examples, right? Did the Rambam provide examples? The Rambam soon say, \"Leficach.\" Okay, now you want to know what that means. Ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha is sort of abstract. What does it mean practically, halacha lema'aseh? Again and again, love and love and love. What does it mean practically? Obviously, it means two things practically: kavod and mamon. Here's the answer, rabbosai. Look, look at this. Look at this. Look, look, again, I'll pose the question, don't answer it. It'll give everyone a minute to, to, to think through the answer themselves. Look at Perek Vav, Halacha Gimmel of Hilchos De'os, and look at Perek Yud Daled, Halacha Alef of Hilchos Aveil, and look at it with the following question in mind: to whom does the mitzvah of ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha apply? To whom is that love supposed to be directed? To whom? Okay, take a minute. Look at Hilchos De'os, see what the answer to that question See if there's an answer provided for that question in Hilchos De'os, look into Hilchos Aveil. Whom are we supposed to love because of the mitzvah of ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha? Look, look inside, rabbosai, unless you already know it by heart, in which case you don't have to look. Okay. What, what's the answer based on Hilchos De'os? That in Hilchos De'os, it's directed towards each and every Jew individually. כל אחד ואחד מישראל, right? Every Jew. To whom, what is the answer based on Hilchos Eivel? Same answer? Achicha beTorah umitzvos. Achicha beTorah umitzvos. The Rambam apparently has, where he gets it from is a different challenge, but for tonight, and maybe beyond, let's just understand, wherever the Rambam got it from, however he reconstructed this from Chazal, the Rambam says there are two tiers, T-I-E-R. There are two tiers in the mitzvah of ahavas Yisrael. There are two levels in the mitzvah of ahavas Yisrael. There's one level of the mitzvah, call it the the most basic level of the mitzvah, which applies to every Jew. There's there's a higher level of the mitzvah, which applies for achicha beTorah umitzvos, someone who shares your commitment to Torah and mitzvos. Ah, so what the Rambam is telling us, we asked, why is it that in Hilchos De'os, seemingly, the Rambam gives us such an incomplete description of what ahavas Yisrael entails? The answer is he didn't give an incomplete description. In Hilchos De'os, the Rambam is talking about that level of ahavas Yisrael, that tier of the mitzvah that applies to כל אחד ואחד מישראל. And eina chana mi, that is more limited than what ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha means vis-a-vis achicha beTorah umitzvos. You, you get that? Is it so far clear? Let's add one other point and then and then whatever time we have left, we'll answer the kashas. Okay, I get it. So, so far, so good, right? We made some headway here, right? We made some headway. But still, the question, maybe it's technically—not maybe, it is, but, you know, speaking rhetorically—maybe it's technically true, it is true, that that the Rambam has these two levels of the mitzvah. There's one level of the mitzvah vis-a-vis kol echad miYisrael. There's another level of the mitzvah vis-a-vis achicha... Oh boy, I can't I can't take that cough. There's another there's another level of of the mitzvah vis-a-vis achicha beTorah umitzvos. But even so, doesn't the question still beg, so why not tell me about both levels in Hilchos De'os? We still haven't really answered our question. We made some headway here, but at the end of the day, okay, I get it. There's two levels to the mitzvah. So, so tell me that in Hilchos De'os! Tell me מצוה על כל אדם לאהוב כל אחד מישראל כגופו, and what's more, מצוה על כל אדם לאהוב אחיך בתורה ומצוות. Because even so, we still haven't really finished answering. Okay, take a minute to think about this and then we'll we'll we'll try to understand that also, be'ezras Hashem yisborach. Take a minute to think about it. You hear where we're holding now? You see the question, rabosai? Good. But there is light at the end of the tunnel. So listen to this, rabosai. Listen, listen, listen. Listen, listen. When we interact with other people, there are two different considerations, both of which we have to be mindful of in terms of how we act, how we treat other people, how we behave, how we speak. One is, what do your midos demand of you in that situation? What do your midos, what do our midos say about how we should be speaking to someone? What do our middos say about how we should be treating the other person? What do our middos dictate as to how we should be behaving? That's one consideration. But then there's another consideration: maybe beyond what our middos demand, what is he deserving of? What is he deserving of? Let's say, kibud av va'em is not just about our middos, right? Kibud av va'em is what what what are my parents deserving of from me? It's not just that I should be, you know, a respectful person and have gratitude. No, it's all that, but it's also about that that what my parents are deserving of from me. Do you hear how those are two different considerations? One mechayev, one consideration is what what do our own middos say? Could be this guy, he doesn't deserve a thing from me. He's never done a thing for me, I don't know, maybe he's even he's been annoying me, he's been a troublemaker for me, could be he doesn't deserve a thing from me. But what do what do our middos dictate in terms of how to treat him, how to behave, how to act? But then there's a second consideration: sometimes you have to go even beyond what your own middos demand because of what he deserves. Maybe this person, now look look at this person, beyond what what our middos require of us in this situation, what is he deserving of in in this situation? Hilchos De'os is about the first. Hilchos De'os is about telling us what our middos is supposed to be, what kind of character we're supposed to cultivate. Hilchos De'os is about how to act in a way that that that that you're being a good person, that you are being moral, that you are being ethical. And and that, it could be the other person doesn't deserve it. Could be the other person doesn't deserve that I should be meshabe'ach him. Could be he's not a very nice person, could be, you know, he's, I don't know, insults people, could be he doesn't deserve it. But our middos demand that that's the way we treat a fellow Jew. Hilchos De'os, again rabosai, is about what our middos require of us. What the Rambam mentions in Hilchos Aveil is not because of what our middos demand of us, it's what acheinu b'Torah u'mitzvos are deserving of. You hear that? And that's why the Rambam doesn't even hint at all of this in Hilchos De'os, because the Rambam, it's true he's talking about the mitzvah of ahavas Yisrael, but it's only—we're about to run out of time today—he's only telling us about ahavas Yisrael, it's only the first level, the first tier of ahavas Yisrael, which is driven