Oneg Shabbos

Shiur of Shas, Sabolowsky Mordechai Adas. The Rambam writes in Hilchos Shabbos that there are four basic mitzvos on Shabbos. The two mitzvos de-Oraisa are Zachor ve-Shamor. Zachor primarily is associated with the mitzvah of making Kiddush on Shabbos, and Shamor is the mitzvah to abstain from melacha, not to do melacha. And of course that's also communicated in the Torah by לא תעשה כל מלאכה. It's also a lav, but the Rambam is emphasizing the four mitzvos asei, the four positive commandments of Shabbos, that to abstain from melacha is not only a mitzvas lo saaseh, but is also a mitzvas asei, also a positive commandment. And then the Rambam says and then there are two additional mitzvos which we don't find in the Chumash, but which we find in Sefer Yeshayahu, and those are the mitzvos with which we're all familiar: Kavod ve-Oneg. In Perek Nun-Ches in Yeshayahu, so the Navi says אם תשב משבת רגליך. If you were planning a trip which would violate Shabbos, maybe Techum Shabbos or other problems, so you have to pull back from that because of Shabbos. עשות חפציך ביום קדשי, and again you also have to refrain from pursuing your own pursuits on my holy day, right, speaking in the name of Hakadosh Baruch Hu. And then the posuk continues וקראת לשבת ענג, that you should designate, kriya as in krias shem, you should designate the Shabbos as a day of oneg, of delight, Likdosh Hashem, the day which Hakadosh Baruch Hu has sanctified should be mechubad, it should be honored. וכבדתו מעשות דרכיך, and this is manifest again from not going about our regular weekday routine, ממצוא חפצך ודבר דבר. We can't engage in business, and even in terms of speech on Shabbos that too the posuk regulates. And hopefully we'll flesh out some of these concepts, but not necessarily comprehensively. So the two mitzvos which we have mi-divrei kabbalah, the two additional mitzvos asei mi-divrei kabbalah from which is recorded and communicated in the Navi in addition to Zachor ve-Shamor in the Chumash are Kavod ve-Oneg. It's generally assumed in terms of distinguishing between the two, and this deserves more time and comment than I'm about to give it, but let's operate with the understanding that Kavod basically refers to how we honor and accord respect to Shabbos on Erev Shabbos in anticipation of Shabbos, and that Oneg is how we take delight in Shabbos over the course of Shabbos. Thus it's part of Oneg Shabbos the Rambam writes to prepare the house for Shabbos, that the house should be clean and prepared for Shabbos, to shower, to bathe is Kavod Shabbos. The fact that we sort of regulate even according to Rabbi Yosi whose view we accept, which we remember from the beginning of Arvei Pesachim, who's not quite as strict, but nevertheless we still try to limit the amount we eat on Erev Shabbos that we should enter Shabbos with an appetite. It's interesting that generally we sort of associate that din with well you're supposed to have an appetite on Shabbos so that's really Oneg Shabbos. But if you look in the Rambam, it's clear that the curtailing what one eats on Erev Shabbos is rather an expression of Kavod Shabbos. It's part of the respect which is accorded by how one anticipates Shabbos. If you're having a very important guest, some dignitary is coming, so the respect one gives him is manifest not only when he comes, but it's in all the hachanos, that you lay out the red carpet and you paint in honor of the person coming. So the way one manifests respect is not only when the orei'ach is present, but in anticipation of the arrival of the orei'ach. So it's interesting that the again curtailing how much we eat on Erev Shabbos is actually a kiyum, is actually an expression of Kavod Shabbos, the again how we accord respect to Shabbos by the anticipation of Shabbos because otherwise it's very strange that Chazal were so insistent to the point of. of imposing a prohibition to ensure that when we eat the Seudah Shabbos that it should be a Mitzvah Min Hamuvchar that we should have appetite. We don't really find in other contexts that Chazal introduced the issurim to ensure a Mitzvah Min Hamuvchar. But the answer is that abstaining from eating on Erev Shabbos is not only intended that on Shabbos I'll have more of an Oneg Shabbos because one will eat with more appetite, with more gusto, but that's also an expression of Kavod Shabbos. The same way having the house prepared and the table set and the beds made are all an expression of Kavod Shabbos, so too abstaining from eating is an expression of Kavod Shabbos as well. Now it's interesting that some things straddle the fence between Kavod Shabbos and Oneg Shabbos, meaning that there's a double kiyum. And one of them is in terms of being dressed for Shabbos. That being dressed in a Shabbos'dike outfit is not only part of Oneg Shabbos that one should on Shabbos be dressed properly, but it's a din in Kavod Shabbos as well. That one is supposed to be waiting to greet the Shabbos dressed in Shabbos'dike clothes. And this actually is something important to keep in mind. Let's say if someone's not going to be in shul Friday night, whether it's women who are not going to shul Friday night or a man got home late from work at the last minute, he's not going to make it to shul. So sometimes people will jump into the shower and then they're not going to make it to shul anyway or they're not planning going to shul, so they'll sort of stay in a robe or something and then they figure those who come to shul, so they're not going to get home till at least a half hour after shkiyah whatever. So a few minutes before then they'll get dressed. So really, recognizing that to be dressed in Shabbos'dike clothes is not only a question of on Shabbos, but it's part of Kavod Shabbos. It's that one should even be greeting Shabbos dressed in Shabbos'dike clothes. So it's very important that one should make every effort to be dressed in Shabbos'dike clothes before Shabbos, even if one is not necessarily going to be going to shul Friday night. Similarly, again, the Rambam also emphasizes having the table set is also an expression of Kavod Shabbos. The anticipation with which one awaits Shabbos, with which one greets Shabbos. And that therefore, again, it's not just a question of calculating well when are people going to come home from shul, when are the guests going to come, so I have to have the table set beforehand. No, it should be an expression of Kavod Shabbos and really we should try to have it done beforehand as well. Then another something else which also straddles the fence between Kavod and Oneg Shabbos, meaning it's both a preparation which is made for Shabbos, again to that the anticipation for Shabbos should reflect honor on Shabbos. And on the other hand, it's also something which helps us take delight in the Shabbos day. So this already the Beis Halevi points out and many others, bentching licht is a double kiyum. There's two dimensions to bentching licht. That on the one hand greeting Shabbos by lighting candles is a kiyum in Kavod Shabbos. Once upon a time there used to be a custom that when an important person, a dignitary would come, so they would go to greet him with candles. As a matter of fact, if they weren't in a position to light candles, they would even greet the person just holding unlit candles. That's why once upon a time candles weren't muktza on Shabbos because they had a function on Shabbos. Their sole function wasn't just to be lit, which if that were the sole function, so then they certainly would be muktza. But once upon a time they had a function that people used to hold candles and go out to greet an Adam Gadol. The Rav used to tell the story that once he was illustrating in what great esteem the Chofetz Chaim and the Beis Halevi, his grandfather and great-grandfather, held the Malbim. In what great esteem the Malbim was held. So he said once the Malbim was passing through where the Beis Halevi was then Rav, I don't know if it was Brisk or if it was one of the other cities where the Beis Halevi had been, so the Beis Halevi told his young daughter at the time she should go put on her Shabbos dress and they should take candles and they would go out with candles to be mekabel panim to greet the Malbim. So bentching licht is not only for Sholom Bayis to have light in the house on Shabbos for Oneg Shabbos, but it's also also an expression of kavod Shabbos that this is the anticipation with which we're greeting Shabbos. Now the whatever nafka minas there may be to those two dimensions on Shabbos are kind of subtle but there's a more obvious one on Yom Tov. The Rambam writes that the mitzvos of kavod and oneg apply not only to Shabbos but they apply to Yom Tov as well. So on Shabbos belo brira you have to bentch licht before Shabbos anyway because you can't because obviously lighting a candle is one of the melochos on Shabbos. So belo brira we're going to bentch licht on erev Shabbos anyway. But on Yom Tov it's not one of the melochos, right? אין מוציאין אש מן העצים ומן האבנים, we can't make a new fire on Yom Tov. Boy scouts can't practice their rubbing the stones together on Yom Tov but to take a fire from an existing fire of course is muttar. Of course is muttar. So potentially it's certainly feasible to bentch licht the night of Yom Tov. You don't necessarily have to bentch licht on erev Yom Tov the way you do on erev Shabbos. But this emphasis that hadlakas neiros has two dimensions to it is not only again a way of providing illumination on Shabbos and Yom Tov that we should be able to delight and enjoy, we should be able to, you have to be from the Bronx to appreciate that, delight, we have to delight and enjoy the day of Shabbos and Yom Tov by having illumination but it's also an expression of kavod Shabbos. So when it comes to Yom Tov then that would advocate that we should do our best to bentch licht on erev Yom Tov the way one does on erev Shabbos as well. Now we mentioned that one of the expressions of kavod and oneg is being dressed in Shabbosdikke clothing. Being dressed in Shabbosdikke clothing. And it's something which is a mitzvah, a mitzvah of kavod and oneg and is doubly important. It's doubly important A because again just per se, even without looking to whatever impact it has on us, it's a mitzvah. It's a mitzvah. So the same way we're supposed to make Kiddush and we're supposed to make Kiddush over a cup of wine and we're supposed to have seudas Shabbos so we're supposed to be dressed in Shabbosdikke clothing. Moreover when a person gets dressed up, a person puts on a Shabbos suit, a Shabbos dress, I think we all experience the the famous principle of the Sefer HaChinuch that אחרי הפעולות נמשכים הלבבות, that often it's through external actions that we sort of arouse ourselves and we sort of awaken feelings within ourselves through external actions. And when a person is dressed casually on Shabbos so A a person is neglecting this component of the mitzvos of kavod and oneg Shabbos and B what that does as every teacher and principal who tells kids in school why they can't walk with their shirts untucked and why they have to be dressed neatly because it creates a certain mindset, it creates a certain frame of mind, so the same is very much true in terms of Shabbos as well. And this obligation is uniform throughout Shabbos. It's not that it's less binding on Friday night, it's not less binding Shabbos afternoon, Shabbos to Mincha, it should be the same special Shabbosdikke malbushim, the same special Shabbos dress. When you scratch the surface a little bit to figure out why this is such a problem in our communities of Shabbosdikke dress, and we'll talk a little bit more about this at the end bli neder, is that we sort of not so much consciously, I don't think this is a conscious thought, but if you scratch the surface subconsciously people work hard all week and you have the weekend and so the weekend is a time of vacation and vacation so people like to be dressed casually. People like to, most people find it more comfortable to be wearing a sweater rather than to be wearing a suit jacket. But Shabbos is not supposed to be, at least not a vacation by that definition, and it's something which which is, which is very, very important for us to keep in mind. Let's talk a little bit now about those mitzvos which are, we talked a little bit about kavod, about showering, preparing the house, setting the table, being dressed already before Shabbos and into Shabbos. Now let's discuss a little bit about Oneg Shabbos. The primary manifestation of Oneg Shabbos, of course, is the obligation to eat shalosh seudos, to eat the three meals on Shabbos. Now, there is a klal that the Talmidei Rabbeinu Yonah in Berachos and the Rama codifies this in Shulchan Aruch as well in Yoreh Deah says that in contrast to Yom Tov, there is no obligation to necessarily eat meat on Shabbos. If a person prefers a salmon steak to a rib steak, so that is, that is equal in the eyes of the Halacha in terms of fulfilling the mitzvah of Oneg Shabbos. It doesn't have the objective, the same rigid objective parameters, say, which mitzvas simcha has on Yom Tov, where simcha is identified with basar v'yayin, so with Oneg that's not the case. It's a more fluid definition and if again, if a person enjoys a salmon steak more than a rib steak, so then gezuntheit and he'll be mikayeim Oneg Shabbos with that. So usually when one discusses this, so the thought crosses, crosses our minds, okay, so my favorite food is Captain Crunch, or my favorite food is pizza and French fries. So for my Seudah Shabbos, I'll have pizza and French fries, and just to make it a real Oneg Shabbos, so I'll top it off with some milchig ice cream at the end. I don't even have to settle for the pareve ice cream. So does that necessarily follow from the fact that the Rama paskens again that there is no, no rigid or formal definition? So the answer is that l'chora it does not. It does not. And the reason for that is that although there is no formal identification of Oneg Shabbos with basar v'yayin as there is in terms of simcha on Yom Tov, but nevertheless Seudah Shabbos is supposed to be something formal. The same way the Rambam describes that what all the hachanos which go into Kavod Shabbos, what are they, they all add up to is that a person should be awaiting Shabbos the way you're awaiting the king. If you hear that the king is coming to town, so then people are meyachel u'metzapeh, there's a great longing and great anticipation. But clearly it's a longing and anticipation for something formal. And therefore, even though we don't have again the rigid, rigid identification of Oneg Shabbos with basar v'yayin necessarily according to the Rama, but it does mean there are constraints that it should be a formal meal. Like say when you go to a wedding, I was at a wedding the other night, so sometimes you have a choice of main courses. So the choice at this wedding was you could either have prime rib beef, beef rib, or whatever it was, or you could have salmon. So even at formal, even at formal affairs, so people serve fish. Mash'ein kein, you don't generally at a wedding have an option of Captain Crunch or pizza. So presumably again this, the elasticity of Oneg Shabbos notwithstanding, but it still has to be something which qualifies as food which would be served on a formal occasion, at a formal dinner. Doesn't that conflict a little bit with Kavod Shabbos? Because let's say, not the pizza-shmizza, but let's say somebody really loves spaghetti and meatballs. They're not going to serve Captain Crunch, but they really love spaghetti and meatballs. And the wife says what can I make you for Shabbos that you will really enjoy? Spaghetti and meatballs is not going to be in a restaurant or at a wedding as a choice of fish or a beef, but spaghetti and meatballs clearly doesn't make it. But from an Oneg point of view, it makes it for the person who's having the Oneg. However, from a Kavod point of view, maybe not? I wanted to see this question of both as to whether it, if you're having Oneg, brings in the Kavod. Right, so perhaps, I don't know, maybe the analogy to a wedding, I don't know whether necessarily that is the ultimate arbiter as to whether or not one sees it on a menu or a selection at a wedding. But again, it has to be something which isn't associated with casual food. Now exactly which side of the divide the spaghetti and meatballs will fall... I don't know, I leave it to the oilam to, we'll take a vote afterward. The Rambam writes that again, since eating the three meals on Shabbos is an expression of oneg Shabbos, again, taking delight in the day of Shabbos, enjoying the day of Shabbos, so therefore, let's say a person just can't eat, he's too full to eat. Come shalosh seudos time, he's just too full to eat. So the din is that a person is not supposed to be metza'er atzmo. He doesn't have to force himself to eat if he can't enjoy it. If he ordinarily wouldn't eat, but if he'll eat, he'll still enjoy it, so then he should do it. But if he's just so full, just full, there was a kiddush in shul this morning and then after the kiddush he went home and had a big meal, and now by 4:30 he has to wash and he just is so full that again he can't even enjoy it, so then the Maggid Mishneh explains with a beautiful phrase that letza'ar nitna, or excuse me, le'oneg nitna, or excuse me, לעונג ניתנה ולא לצער ניתנה. The shalosh seudos, again, is supposed to be a way of having delight in Shabbos, enjoying Shabbos, not tza'ar. So the Mishnah Berurah quotes from the poskim and it's something which as he points out is very relevant at this time of the year that hachacham einav berosho, that on the short days it's true that if I eat a big meal in the morning and because of that I just can't bear the thought of washing at 4:30 in the afternoon, it's true that at that point I wouldn't wash for shalosh seudos, but hachacham einav berosho, it's better that a person should limit a little bit, he should be mema'et what he eats earlier in the day on Shabbos so that even in the winter season a person will be able to fulfill the mitzvah of having shalosh seudos. Why wouldn't that same thing apply also to the clothing issue, לעונג ניתנה ולא לצער ניתנה? Person walks around in a... so I think that's a good question. I think the answer is the same, it's the same Captain Crunch answer. Is that what it means again, that okay, so let's say there are two different kinds of suits. Okay, so wearing the tuxedo with the cummerbund so I have to hold my breath all day, okay, so that's לעונג ניתנה ולא לצער ניתנה. I can get a nice Shabbos suit which I don't have to hold my breath all day. It's the same answer, that לעונג ניתנה ולא לצער ניתנה doesn't make it totally subjective. What it means is again where it's kind of, it means within the bounds of formality. Within the bounds of formality, I don't know guys, I don't know if anyone is, again, sometimes we eat so much that we can't bear to, can't bear the thought of taking another bite. I don't know, does anyone ever reach a stage he can't bear the thought of wearing a suit on Shabbos? I don't know that it ever reaches that point. It doesn't reach that point. It certainly is true, it certainly is true that many people will feel more comfortable walking around in a sweater rather than a jacket, but that's the same answer as the answer to, so you save the sweater for the Captain Crunch Sunday morning for breakfast. Now I'd like to take a few minutes just to comment on what the various dinim of kavod ve'oneg Shabbos are supposed to add up to. Again, so we've been talking about the various details, all important unto themselves, but what are they all supposed to add up to? Again, the mitzvah to honor Shabbos through our hachanos, through our preparations and anticipation, the mitzvah to enjoy Shabbos, to take delight in Shabbos. So clearly what they all add up to and Chazal are not subtle about this. Chazal are not subtle about this. Let's say in daber davar, right? So the last phrase in the pasuk that we read before from Yeshayahu is that our speech on Shabbos has to be different than our speech during the, our speech during the week. On Shabbos we're not allowed to talk about doing melachah, right? On Shabbos I can't talk about driving the car because what you're not allowed to do, you shouldn't, what involves melachah you shouldn't speak about either. A person shouldn't talk about 'oh I've made twenty mortgage payments and now I have another forty mortgage payments to make until my house is paid off'. ממצוא חפצך ודבר דבר. And Chazal say that diburcha b'Shabbos should be different than diburcha b'chol, that the way a person talks on Shabbos should be different than the way a person talks during the week. Similarly, what we spoke about the din of wearing Shabbosdik clothing. So there too the halachah again is not subtle in the message it's sending, that malbushcha b'Shabbos shouldn't be like malbushcha b'chol. Ad kedei kach, again, the way one is dressed on Shabbos shouldn't be. should be different, should be different, shouldn't be the same as the way one is dressed during the weekday. Ad k'dei kach, the Gemara discusses, let's say you have a person who אין לו אלא חלוק אחד, he only owns one suit, he has to wear, nebach, he has to wear the same suit seven days a week. So the Gemara says that he should try to in some way make it look different on Shabbos than in the week, maybe there's a hem which can be kept up all week long and can be let down for Shabbos. That's probably one of the sources for the people who wear the bekeshe or the kapota on Shabbos is that the Gemara seems to indicate that the difference between a beged Shabbos and a beged chol is that a beged chol is a shorter jacket and a beged Shabbos is a longer one. But there too, the Gemara says, so for us, Baruch Hashem, we can afford, we have a weekday suit, we have a Shabbos suit, so the Shabbos suit is nicer than the weekday suit. But the Gemara says even if one's not in the position, again, to fulfill that of having the Shabbos suit be nicer than the weekday suit, it has to be different. So it's quite clear that what all these dinim are intended to add up to, the net result is that we're supposed to manifest and experience that Shabbos is unique, that Shabbos is unique. That's clearly what all these dinim are geared towards, that's what they add up to. It's interesting that the Rambam in Sefer Hamitzvos, when he talks about the first of the two mitzvos d'oraisa, right, we mentioned that there were four mitzvos asei on Shabbos, two of the Torah, zachor v'shamor, two mi'divrei kabala that we've been talking about, kavod v'oneg. So the mitzvah of zachor is to make kiddush. Now the Rambam, as you know, is of the opinion that that mitzvah includes making havdala as well. It's sort of to demarcate, to delineate Shabbos at its inception and at its point of departure, to delineate Shabbos. So the Rambam in Sefer Hamitzvos has a very interesting phrase in terms of, well, what does the kiddush have to consist of? Again, the actual text of kiddush we have is from the Anshei Knesses Hagedola. So of course the actual text, as is usually the case in terms of shmoneh esrei and all brachos, is miderabbanan. But so what are the rules for what kiddush has to contain mideoraisa before there was a fixed text? So it's interesting that the Rambam says that what has to be accentuated in kiddush is hibadlo mishar hayamim, that the mitzvah of זכור את יום השבת לקדשו is to articulate the fact that Shabbos is set off. Hibadlo, is set off, is unique from all other days. And then that's what the mitzvah of kiddush is. So that actually leads in beautifully to what the Rav zichrono livracha explained, he developed this in the first volume of the Yortzeit Shiurim, developed at length, that basically the mitzvos mi'divrei kabala of kavod v'oneg are not really new independent mitzvos mi'divrei kabala, they're a flushing out, flushing out, and they're ensuring and giving us guidelines how to achieve what the Torah already wants. And that is that Shabbos is not just again, sort of a passive day, which is too often how we experience it, but rather Shabbos is a unique day. Shabbos is a unique day. And that's why I don't speak on Shabbos the way I speak all week. I don't dress on Shabbos the way I dress all week. I wait and anticipate with great longing for Shabbos, I delight in the day. All of this is to point and highlight the fact that Shabbos is unique. Now what exactly, let's try to define, just taking another minute or two, what exactly is the uniqueness of Shabbos? The Midrash tells us that each day has a partner. Sunday is coupled with Monday, Tuesday with Wednesday, Thursday with Friday, Shabbos is odd man out. So Hakadosh Baruch Hu says that Knesses Yisrael, the Jewish people, is the bas zug. That's the partner of Shabbos. So apparently there's a common theme or a common element to the uniqueness of Shabbos and the uniqueness of Knesses Yisrael. So what is that? So we know the pasuk says, I think Rashi quotes this at the beginning of parshas Bereishis, that קדש ישראל לה' ראשית תבואתו. That the uniqueness of Knesses Yisrael is that Knesses Yisrael is consecrated to Hakadosh Baruch Hu, to Hashem, kodesh Yisrael la'hashem. That we're a ממלכת כהנים וגוי קדוש again. No, that we're consecrated to Hakadosh Baruch Hu, that's what the uniqueness of Klal Yisrael is. Similarly, it's true that this pasuk is not talking about the Shabbos the seventh day of the week, but it's it's talking about Shabbos in the context of of Shmita, but it's the same concept of Shabbos ושבתה הארץ שבת להשם. So that's what seems to be the the partnership, the coupling of Knesses Yisrael and Shabbos is that whereas during the week, Sunday through Friday a person is concerned with all kinds of mundane affairs, now even though, even though, even those mundane affairs a person is supposed to try to orient l'shem Shamayim. A person should be pursuing a parnassa l'shem Shamayim and everything he does, but even so it's it's one step removed, right? The motivation is is l'shem Shamayim, but still I have to go to work and I have to think about I have to think about all these figures and about all the money and this and that, it's true that one should be doing it l'shem Shamayim וכל מעשיך יהיו לשם שמים, but nevertheless it is not as direct, it is one step removed. Shabbos is kulo l'Hashem. Shabbos is that again is totally consecrated to Hakadosh Baruch Hu and that's what Klal Yisrael is supposed to be as well, Kodesh Yisrael Lashem. And I'll just conclude that the Rav zichrono l'vracha used to say in his drashas, used to say, you know we've survived now almost two millennia without the Beis Hamikdash. Jewish people are capable of surviving without without the Beis Hamikdash. He says without Shabbos he says we wouldn't last a year. Without Shabbos a Jew ceases to be a Jew, Knesses Yisrael is the bazugo of Shabbos. Halavai we should be zoche, the Gemara says Rav Schechter was talking about the dinim of yerusha, nachala, so the Gemara says that if a person is me'aneig es haShabbos, so he's zoche to nachala bli m'tzarim, he's he he merits a nachala with with no boundaries, it's no borders, it's an unbounded nachala. So halavai that we should be able to again not only on the surface comply with all the dinim of kavod and oneg of Shabbos, but to understand what it's all oriented towards and be zoche to be me'aneig es haShabbos.