004 Letter 97

Hi good morning Rabbosai. I apologize for the delay. Maybe just one addendum to yesterday's letter and yesterday's discussion. Sometimes a person can sort of have the need for the, again, self-judgment in the sense and the context of what we were speaking about yesterday. Sometimes it can be thrust upon him even at a time which is pasul l'don. So when a person can sort of choose his moments, so then he chooses again as discussed yesterday the times which are kosher l'don. What happens if a person has a decision, is at a crossroads and a decision needs to be made but again in terms of where he is existentially for whatever reason, so he's not at this moment it's a sha'ah which is psulah l'don. So then it becomes very, very important that a person should be misyayetz and that those who are for whom it is a שעה כשירה לדון help him navigate that situation. Okay, let's see today's letter. I think we'll skip the Mazel Tov and the bracha about his getting married and we'll go with the mitso'nen. מצטנן אתה על גורלם של יוצאי הישיבות. You're complaining about the fate of people who leave the koslei hayeshiva. שמנת חלקם היא הרגשת הבדידות והעזיבה לנפשם. That they feel lonely, they feel abandoned.

לפני ימים אחדים ביקר אותי אחד מיוצאי הישיבה שנסתגר לפינה נידחת ורחוק מן המרכז.

Someone who's living out in the sticks somewhere came to visit me. והשמיע באזני משל נאה. He shared with me the following moshal.

כשנותנים מים בתוך כלים ומעמידים את הכלים על האש הרי בשעה שהכלים עומדים על האש.

Right, as long as the water is on the fire, so you can't really measure, you can't get an accurate sense for how much water is in the pot. כי מחמת רתיחת האש hamayim ma'alim avatbuos. Because of the heat of the fire, so the water is bubbling ומתנשאים על השפה העליונה של הכלי and they become elevated until the top of the kli. Maybe they even spill over. ורק לאחרי שמורידים את הכלים מן האש only after you take it off the fire וחום הרתיחה פוסק מלפעול עליהם and you don't have the heat affecting them anymore אז אפשר להיווכח איזה כלי מלא. And on the other hand ואיזה ריק למחצה לשליש לרביע and which is maybe only half full, only a third full, only a quarter full. והוא הדין ביוצאי הישיבה. le-mashal, כל זמן שאדם נמצא בתוך כותלי הישיבה פנימה, as long as a person is within Yeshiva, הרי הוא נמצא על האש. that's the analog to the pot on the fire. ורתיחת הקול הפנימי של תורה ויראה פועלת על נפשו, and all the heat generated by the intensity of the environment of Torah and Yiras, it affects him. ואפילו אם יש בו הרבה חסרונות, even if le-mayseh there's a lot which is missing and a lot which is empty, ein hi nireis, it isn't necessarily so easily discernible, so obviously noticeable, ki machmas ha-resicha, because of the heat, מעט התוכן אשר בנפשו, the meager substance within him, ממלא את כל החלל, is filling the whole, the whole space. I'm getting periodically, just in case I disappear here, I'm getting periodically a message that tells me my internet connection is unstable, so I don't know, if we get cut off, I apologize rabbosai. ורק לאחר ההסרה מן האש, only after, again in terms of what the analog is to removing the pot from the fire, which is kshe-yotzei min ha-yeshiva, ve-ha-resicha posekes, and again, you no longer have that heat which is generated by the environment, אז אפשר באמת לדעת את שיעור התוכן הרוחני, then one can really know the extent of the spiritual content and substance הנמצא בלבבו של בן הישיבה, which has been developed inwardly, internally, within the ben yeshiva. והנני בזה להביע את תקוותי, I hereby express my hope

כי המשך חייך בעתיד לא יבייש את הגחלת אשר לשלהבתה התחממת,

to whose flame you warmed. I don't know if he's referring to Yeshivas Chaim Berlin or he's referring to himself, I'm not sure which, who's the gacheles here. The yesod is this rabbosai. One way to characterize life is that life consists of a series of transitions, and many of those transitions are not just a function of the social conventions of the society in which we happen to live in this time, in this place, but many of those transitions are just really woven into the very fabric of life, the transition from as infants and children, the transition from where we're dependent upon our parents, the transition from dependence to independence, the transition from being single to becoming בעזרת השם בעל אשה ובנים. One of the transitions, Chazal say,

למד תורה ודרך ארץ, לעולם ילמד אדם תורה ואחר כך ילמד אומנות ואחר כך ישא אשה.

And then certainly for most people, again, some, the Ribono Shel Olam matched up their kochos hanefesh with going into chinuch or rabbonus, but even that is a transition. Even for those there's a transition. It's not as if there's no transition from being in the yeshiva. So it's a transition which Hakadosh Baruch Hu wove into the very fabric of life. And again, you see it in that ma'amar Chazal, yilmad adam torah, so that means he's going to be full-time learning. At a certain point, acharkach yilmad umnos. At a certain point, it doesn't mean he stops learning torah, but obviously it means that he's beginning to have to balance. And then once he's mastered the umnos, so then presumably he's ready to start practicing the umnos and yisa isha with all of the blessed consequences and implications of that. Any transition which Hakadosh Baruch Hu built into the fabric of life, meaning it's not something which society is imposing upon us, it's not something which is self-imposed, it's something Hakadosh Baruch Hu wove into the very fabric of life, so כל דעביד רחמנא לטב עביד. Every stage of life at which a person finds himself, whatever transition is looming, needs to be made, so כל דעביד רחמנא לטב עביד. It's a challenge. It's always difficult to move from what we're used to because what we're used to becomes our comfort zone. But it's an expression of bitachon. An expression, better yet emunah is the more appropriate word in this context. It's an expression of emunah for a person to view, again, those life transitions which are part of the very fabric of life, to view them with a positive attitude and to approach it with that type of positive mindset. And I think that that's part of what's reflected in this mashal, that ultimately, the point of boiling the water is to take the water off the fire. So the point is not to stop learning, the point is not to leave yeshiva a day before a person is supposed to leave yeshiva or need to leave yeshiva, but when the time comes that it's clear that that life transition, and again, the transition may be from yeshiva, it doesn't have to be to whatever the next step is, even if the next step is chinuch, it's still a major, major transition. But when a person finds himself ready to make that transition, so the attitude towards that transition and the mindset has to be one of, okay, so this is how the Ribono Shel Olam designed life. If Hakadosh Baruch Hu designed life that way, so that means this is something positive. It may not be something that I find especially easy, but it's good. And that is the attitude that a person should have and it's the attitude which allows the person to matzliach, and the same thing is true as a person goes through the whole life cycle and makes transitions, makes transitions from being young to being older. Every transition comes with, brings with it its own new set of challenges, but this a person can always know and can always draw strength from when those transitions, they're not if they're not artificial transitions. Transitions that a person is self-imposing or that society is imposing, but they are transitions which are part of the fabric of life woven by Hakadosh Baruch Hu, so the transition is is good and a person should should approach it with with that mindset. Okay, so we'll stop here for for this for this part and again I'm hoping בלי נדר אם ירצה השם that we'll we'll pick up around around 1:30. Okay, have a wonderful morning early afternoon. Okay. Thank you, kol tuv.