Pirkei Avos 1:12

Hillel says
הוי מתלמידיו של אהרן אוהב שלום ורודף שלום אוהב את הבריות ומקרבן לתורה,
you should love the creatures and bring them closer to Torah. Excellent. So before we talk about the אוהב שלום ורודף שלום etc., it’s an interesting phrase: הוי מתלמידיו של אהרן. So you see that to be considered someone’s talmid, you don’t have to personally interact. It doesn’t have to be that the talmid lived in the same generation as the Rebbi, because okay, here we go. So it’s an interesting usage, right? To be for someone to be Rebbi, for you to be a talmid, it doesn’t mean that you lived in the same generation. It could be, I mean this Mishna, Hillel, there’s already been thousands of years after Aharon HaKohen and we’re already thousands of years after Hillel. Hillel lived during the time of the Beit HaMikdash, when the Beit HaMikdash was still standing. But that doesn’t prevent one from becoming a talmid of Aharon. To be a talmid of Aharon means to imbibe his teachings. Aharon HaKohen represents, embodied, he taught אוהב שלום ורודף שלום. If a person develops those middot, he’s his talmid. But the Rambam in Mishneh Torah sometimes writes rabosai, ho-revei rabosai, ha-revei ha-posek refers to his rebbeim. And usually what he means by that is the Ri-Migash and maybe the Rif as well. But the Rambam didn’t know either of them personally. Ri-Migash was the Rambam’s father’s rebbe. Rambam’s father R' Maimon, so he was a talmid of the Ri-Migash and the Ri-Migash was a talmid of the Rif. But the Rambam didn’t know them. Yet the Rambam refers to them as raboseinu. So that usage comes from this Mishna, right? You don’t have to, you can be a talmid of someone if you accept and implement and live their teachings. So what was Hillel's, what did Hillel teach? אוהב שלום ורודף שלום אוהב את הבריות ומקרבן לתורה. So let’s take a look at the Rambam again. Let’s look at the sheet for a second. Let’s go.
אמרו שאהרן עליו השלום שהיה מרגיש באדם שתוכו רע או שהיה מספר לו שתוכו רע.
So Aharon Alav HaShalom when he would meet somebody or talk to somebody who they were really they were a bad person they their... or people told him who were always talked about them, maybe Aharon himself would detect that this person is on a bad path in life. Aharon was able to detect that himself or maybe he didn’t know the person, maybe he had never interacted with the person and people told him שהיה מספר לו שתוכו רע, o shebeyado aveira. היה מתחיל לו לשלום. He would start saying hello peacefully and haya mitahev alav and he would love him and היה מרבה לספר עמו and he would talk to him a lot. והיה ישב ויבש בנפשו. So then this person would start, they their soul kind of settled down, they would stop doing so many aveirot, right? Like, so Aharon HaKohen if he heard that someone was a chotei, Aharon HaKohen would go out of his way to befriend that person. And he would, he'd choose them out of love and so what, you know, without referencing the person's way of life, without referencing everything bad that person's involved with, what would that person's reaction be like? והיה איש הוא מתבייש בנפשו. He would, so then he'd stop doing such bad things. He'd be embarrassed, right? Internally, he'd be embarrassed. He'd be embarrassed and say d'omer oy li, woe is on me.
אילו היה יודע אהרן צפון לבי ורוע מעללי לא היה מתיר לעצמו להסתכל בי.
If Aaron had known what my heart desired and what my evil actions were, he wouldn't allow himself to even look at me. What is tzefun? That's right, tzefun, and tzefun me'hakoach. So what about tzefun? Teshuvah, to lock to see, to hide, tzefun first on afikoman which is the hidden one. So אילו היה יודע אהרן צפון לבי. If Aaron would only know what's hidden in my heart. If Aaron would only know that I walk around all day thinking about how I can cheat in business and how I can take advantage of someone. If Aaron would only know what's in my mind and heart all day long. And not only what's going on in my heart and mind but v'roa ma'alalai, my evil of my actions, and all of those actions. So he wouldn't allow himself to even look at me. What is that an allusion to? There's actually a Halacha not to look at a Rasha. So I think that that's what the Yalkut is alluding to here. Kal v'chomer, how much more so would he not associate if he knew. ואמנם אני אצלו בחזקת אדם כשר. Nonetheless, I'm with him with the assumption that I'm a kosher guy, I'm not a Rasha. Meaning so the Rasha assumed that Aaron was interacting with him on mistaken pretense, that Aaron was erroneously assuming that he was an upstanding person when the opposite was true.
ואכן אאמת דבריו ומחשבותיו ואהיה חוזר למוטב ונעשה מתלמידיו הלומדים ממנו.
So what does that mean? V'achein a'amet. I will, I'll start speaking more truth and I'll make his assumptions true. Right now, Aaron is associating with me on false pretenses, because he thinks that I'm a good person. So I can't continue to take advantage of this big tzaddik. So I'm going to make his assumptions true. I'm going to change myself and I'm going to become a good person. La'ameit d'varov, I'll make his words, his thoughts, his assumptions true. V'eheyeh chozer l'motov, I'll return to being good. And what would happen as a result? ונעשה מתלמידיו הלומדים ממנו. And this person because Aharon HaKohein befriended him would become one of Aaron's talmidim.
אמר השם יתברך כשתראו בזאת המידה הנכבדת בשלום ובמישור הלך אתי ורבים השיב מעוון.
So Hashem says that when you have this middah, this is actually a pasuk, a pasuk in Navi says describing Aharon HaKohein what it's describing this wonderful quality of Aaron. When it's describing Aaron, k'she'tireh b'zos hamidah with this wonderful middah, quote, בשלום ובמישור הלך אתי ורבים השיב מעוון. He practiced shalom throughout his whole life. he walked in front of me, Hashem speaking, with peace, and what did he achieve? Verabbim heishiv me-avon. So that's what the middah of Aharon was, that by being Ohev Sholom and Rodef Sholom, Ohev es habriyos, all this culminated in umikarevun latorah. Okay, let's perhaps ask another question. We'll hold that on the back burner for a minute. You said that Aharon was Ohev Sholom and Rodef Sholom, Ohev es habriyos. So how do you, and even more than looking at a rasha, what I said Aharon HaKohen was associated with a rasha? Because until he did teshuvah, he was a rasha, right? What was the justification for that? Isn't there a mitzvah of tochacha? Aren't you supposed to come off? What's the phrase from Chumash for the mitzvah of tochacha? Hocheiach tochiach. Okay, so let's take a look at the next source here in Rambam, Sefer Hamitzvos, and see if we can try to find an answer. המצוה החמישית שהיא צונו. He says that it's a mitzvah to see that your friend chata, when you see that he's chata, or he walked on a derech that wasn't good. Maybe there isn't the concrete thing that you can identify but you see he's not on the right path, you see that he's keeping bad company, you see that he's not in a good place.
מצוה להחזירו למוטב ולהודיעו שהוא חוטא על עצמו במעשיו הרעים.
It's a mitzvah to fully return him and to make him realize that he sinned against himself with bad actions. שהוא חוטא על עצמו. What does it mean שהוא חוטא על עצמו? He sinned against himself. Well his behavior is self-destructive. Right? Cheit is self-destructive behavior. הוכח תוכיח את עמיתך. It's a mitzvah to show your friend... hocheiach tochiach. Okay so let's stop there. If you had to highlight for our sugya, what three words would you have? Mitzvah lehachziro lemutav. Right. Do you see that? Why would you highlight those three words? Those are the only three words together that make sense. Mitzvah lehachziro lemutav. Why would you highlight those three words? That's the definition of the mitzvah. He's defining what it is... So that's what our sugya says. On one hand it's simple and obvious, but on the other hand I'm not sure that we always stop to recognize it. The mitzvah of tochacha is not per se to tell someone off. If someone is behaving badly, if someone's on a bad path in life, the Torah doesn't have a mitzvah per se to tell them off. There's no mitzvah to chastise him, there's no mitzvah to yell at him. There's a mitzvah to try to help him for the better. And whatever measures encompass that, whatever measures are best suited towards accomplishing that, that fulfills the mitzvah of tochacha. That's why mitzvah lehachziro lemutav is so crucial because there's no chiyuv if again someone is really in a bad way and he's going on the wrong path. There's no mitzvah to yell at him. Or maybe there is a mitzvah to yell at him if that would be the most effective way to get through to him, then you'd have a mitzvah to yell at him. If the most effective way is to talk to him softly and warmly, you do that. If the most effective way is not even to reference the cheit at all, but just to mekarev him. So the mitzvah isn't any of these per se, the mitzvah is to achieve that result, to do what it... to this situation is most likely to yield that result of hashivato. What does the din of אסור לו מסתכל ברשע or what does the din that at times you have to rebuke? אסור לו מסתכל ברשע means you're not engaging in it, what are you just looking at him for? Why, what do you need to help the experience a negative? This is a big avodah in terms of you can't rebuke. So what does a person do who does mistakel b'rashah? If a person is engaged in what in this context probably is the most effective way of being mayshiv someone to tshuva and being mekarev someone, so then after everything he's doing is a mitzvah. אסור לו מסתכל ברשע doesn't mean you have to tell him you're a bum because of what you're doing. And maybe in some cases maybe that shock treatment is what's needed in some cases. And if that's true, so then that would be the mitzvah. But more often than not and that's what the Rambam is describing here, u-keshem she-haya is an application of what he said in Hilchos Deos of hamachaziro l'mitav. Do you see the drasha there? How does the Rambam read that into the pasuk? Because the pasuk seems to be saying normal rebuke, isn't it whatever it is to chastise him or to bring up the chet and tell him that's not what you should be doing? That's the question. Doesn't the pasuk speak of tochacha? So what is the word tochacha? Proof, clarify. It doesn't its most basic meaning isn't to rebuke, isn't to chastise, isn't to yell, isn't to put someone in their place. It's to clarify, right? Hochecha. When you prove something you clarify that this is true. How do you know that these two angles how do you know that these two angles are equal angles? So you construct the proof, so you're clarifying. You're proving. הוכח תוכיח את עמיתך. Before anything else, the core meaning is, this person is moving down the wrong road so he thinks that's the way he's going to enjoy life. So he couldn't be more wrong. And he couldn't be more in judgment than that. So הוכח תוכיח את עמיתך, clarify for him, show him that this is the way to have and that's why the Rambam says that but let's read please to the Hilchos Deos again. And now I want take out your highlighters and highlight a different phrase. Who's reading it? Please.
הרואה חברו שחטא או שהלך בדרך לא טובה מצוה להחזירו למוטב ולהודיעו שהוא חוטא על עצמו במעשיו הרעים שנאמר הוכח תוכיח את עמיתך.
Okay, so what are we highlighting now? In light of what we were just discussing, what are we highlighting now for the first time? Lehodio shehu choteh? Lehodio, yes, lehodio, but not just shehu choteh. Unless a person rachmana litzlan is rachmana litzlan seriously seriously emotionally ill, people don't knowingly intentionally engage in self-destructive behavior. Unless a person God forbid is really really emotionally ill rachmana litzlan. So the strongest instinct a person has, every one of us, strongest instinct we all have is self-preservation. Is self-preservation. If a person is about rachmana litzlan is about to crash, it's just totally instinctive and totally reflexive that a person turns the wheel to try to avoid the crash. It's the most... If a person is sinning, so that's obviously self-destructive behavior. So it means that you know he's so caught up in, I don't know, superficialities and he's so caught up maybe with peer pressure so he's keeping up an appearance and he's not thinking. And that's so what you're doing, even when the Rambam isn't describing Aharon HaKohen's method, even when the Rambam is describing what direct method, he's not talking about chastising, he's not talking about hitting him over the head, either literally or or figuratively. He's not talking about hitting him over the head, either literally or or figuratively. It's on lehodia. Lehodia, the Rambam's lehodia is reflecting, again, what we were just talking about, that lehokhiah, the semantics of lehokhiah are not to rebuke, that's sort of a derivative meaning, the real semantics are to to show. That's what the Rambam says. The mitzvah is lehodia. Once that's the case, so then in some cases, and this is what worked for Aharon HaKohen, the best thing was not even to broach it directly. Okay, so that's a good question. What's the... everyone hear the question? Maybe if a person, you know, broaches the issue directly so then... but if you take Aharon HaKohen's method, so wouldn't Aharon be concerned that maybe he'll be negatively influenced by that אוי לרשע אוי לשכנו or what's the אוי לרשע אוי לשכנו? Maybe it's connected to what the Rambam was expressing that the rasha is really like a tinok shenishba, so Aharon is so totally past that and Aharon was on such a high level he understands high-level ideas, so he's not going to stoop down to that level. So the answer is that ein hachi nami, I think a person is supposed to make a self-assessment as to whether or not you know a person shouldn't fortuitously be in company with a rasha, and even when it's for purposes of kirov, so a person has to assess as to whether this is something that they're doing leshem mitzvah and that they're strong enough to do or not. Okay, everyone hear that question? Yes, no? Can you say a little louder please? How do I choose between... So how does a person have bitachon for sure? Let's say a person says, \"I'm going to go into kiruv.\" And so as part of that kiruv, I'm going to engage people in discussions about why to believe in Hashem and why to believe in Torat Hashem, and I'm going to let them ask any questions they have and I'm going to let them express any doubts they have and I'll respond to them. How does a person know that maybe he's going to be negatively influenced? Maybe their questions will undermine his bitachon? And since we don't know the future, and because we don't know the future, how can you ever be in such a situation? That's a great question. Let's take a minute and think about it and then we'll try to answer the question. Okay, so let's answer with a mashal. Let's answer with a mashal. You know the Gemara says that לעולם אל יביא אדם עצמו לידי ניסיון. A person should never voluntarily put himself in a situation where he has a nisayon, because David HaMelech invited a nisayon and failed with Bat Sheva. That makes sense. On the other hand, we know from the Messilat Yesharim at the very start that all life is one series, one uninterrupted series of nisayonot. Whatever a person's circumstances in life, it's a nisayon. If a person is wealthy, it's a nisayon that he shouldn't be corrupted by the wealth. If a person is poor, chas v'shalom, it's a nisayon that he shouldn't resort to tough tactics to overcome that poverty, that he shouldn't be angry over his poverty. Everything's a nisayon. So what's the Gemara saying? All life is a nisayon. So the answer, hopefully, is that we're supposed to distinguish between nisayonot which are woven into the fabric of life, which are part of life, and nisayonot which a person is totally gratuitously, totally unnecessarily bringing upon himself. So what the Ramchal is talking about, nisayonot that are part of life, not that I am unnecessarily creating that nisayon. And the Gemara is saying, \"Don't go looking for extra nisayonot.\" But the nisayonot that are part of life, so a person can't run away from them, and inevitably he doesn't try to run away from them, so that he's going to end up without doing something wrong, and he'll be protected. I've heard of once, and I'm not sure if this is true, but what was necessarily said about Monsey and in Tsfat, that there are certain schools where if the grandparents don't observe Shabbat, they don't accept kids to the school. And what's the reason for that discriminatory practice? The reason for that practice is that if the grandparents are not shomer Shabbat, so that means that these kids have a certain exposure that other kids might not have. And we're looking that every kid should grow up in a bubble of kedushah v'taharah. Now, it's important to understand two things about that. Number one, that that sentiment, that you want to raise children with kedushah v'taharah, is a wonderful, noble sentiment. And then number two, that that... It's so horrific. But how can both be true? The sentiment is, it is normal. You want as much as possible that children should be exposed to pure, wholesome influences and not from the outside world. And yet, when you act on that sentiment, it can yield a result which is horrible. So what went wrong? The sentiment, the impetus, is top and the result is bottom. How does that happen? So here is the mistake. The mistake is, again, what we were just talking about. You can't run away from nisyonos that are built into life. You can only avoid unnecessary nisyonos. In fact, it's absolutely the case that the Jewish tradition has both built and also spoken about children and how they should be protected and shielded. So that means, yes, is it true that children shouldn't hear certain things and shouldn't see things at their grandparents' home? That children shouldn't be exposed to olam ha-zeh? Yes, it is true that that could happen. But that nisayon is a part of life because you can't be, and when you try to avoid a nisayon that is a part of life, there is no sense. Some nisyonos come, nisyonos help us grow, they're built into life. And when we try to avoid those, so in trying to avoid those, we definitely do something else wrong because it is impossible, it is impossible to avoid nisyonos that are built into life. So we live in a world of nisyonos that are built into life and therefore we just have to figure out what's the best way to handle it, but not try to avoid it. So now, can I build a question? Is anyone, can even a person be known with a thousand percent certainty that that person, or that that influence, is something that is unavoidable? So the answer is no, it's difficult. But you can't hold up for that standard because if you do that, then you're by definition abandoning people. So what am I going to do? You have to look and see, give them the roots, give them everything, so that it seems like they're strong enough to engage people without being adversely affected. But if you hold up a standard, it's going to be impossible to honestly engage. So is Rabbi saying that a person like Aaron HaKohen, who knew, I don't know if he knew himself, if he knew himself as somebody who was like the paradigm of אוהב שלום ורודף שלום and therefore that was his job and that was his nisayon in life and therefore he could do it? Aaron HaKohen, correctly. Right. Again, it's not well, let's clarify something else. Another important element of your question is, is it gaivedik? Is it gaivedik to think that I can be involved in kiruv and I can engage people in conversation and discussion and the result will be what Aaron HaKohen does? Is it gaivedik for those people to think that? Well, let's maybe try to tackle that question. What do you say about that, Rabbi? Is it gaivedik for a person to think? You get the question? So what do you say, is that gaivedik? Sounds gaivedik. But is it? Well... So what do you say? Is that gavra? Sounds gavra. But is it? When not? Does that just mean that the gavra is muvtal to the shem shamayim? It is the shem shamayim, that's correct. עשה דוחה לא תעשה. I'm not checking. I don't think it's... I'd say the gavra is muvtal to the shem shamayim. So what is the definition of anava? What's the definition of ga'avah? What you said is 100... well, it's 50% correct, down to the second question you're 100% correct. What you said is correct, and very important. How do the biggest talmidei chachamim, how do they answer life and death questions? For that person to think to himself, \"Yes, I am qualified and I'm going to answer this life and death question of should I treat this patient, should I not treat this patient, whatever the life and death question is,\" isn't that almost like being a ba'al ga'avah? Or is it the shem shamayim itself can be gavra in that moment? It's not for yourself. It's for Hashem. Wow, okay. We're really getting in depth, okay. A great warrior does not show off because it's not his own power. Good, excellent. Can we say maybe a person has to know his place and know like this is his job to do, like this is what he has to do, it's not anava, it's not ga'avah, this is just what he has to do and that's it? That's also okay. 50-50. Everything you said is correct. It's like you're not doing it yourself, you're mivatel yourself to the ratzon Hashem. If you don't do it yourself, then you don't have to be a ba'al ga'avah. So here, what you're all saying, let's distill it in a sense to the following. I heard this many years ago from a rebbe of mine, his name was Rav Gershon Zaks, he was a grandson of the Chafetz Chaim. So he said as follows. Anava, humility, doesn't mean that if someone has learned Shas, he thinks he knows nothing. Anava doesn't mean a person is a fake, that he knows nothing. Let's say a person has only learned one daf in Shas but he thinks he knows all of Shas. So that's not ba'al ga'avah, he's crazy. That's not ba'al ga'avah, right? He's not ba'al ga'avah, he's just out of space. He thinks he knows all of Shas. That's not ba'al ga'avah, that's detachment from reality. So what's anava, what's ga'avah? Both an anav and a ba'al ga'avah can have accurate self-perception. But the anav, the humble person, realizes that yes, I worked hard, but I worked hard with the abilities Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave me, the opportunities Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave me, and with the siyata d'ishmaya that he crowned my efforts with success. And even more fundamentally, my very existence is His. Everything about me belongs to Him. So the person who's an anav, if he knows Shas, he knows that he knows Shas, but he's not machzik tovah le'atzmo. He's not self-congratulatory about it because again, what's me? The yegiah v'amal, the need to work hard, the need for working assiduously? That's my achievement. But everything else that a person is doing is with the existence Hashem gave him, the kelim Hashem gave him, the opportunities Hashem gave him. So the anav, he does not feel superior, he doesn't feel self-congratulatory, he doesn't have this attitude of being self-congratulatory. The ga'avah, the ba'al ga'avah, on the other hand, no, maybe he knows Shas and he's good about that, but he thinks kochi ve'otzem yadi. \"And do you know why I know Shas? Because I'm so smart.\" But who gave you the brain? Ba'al ga'avah doesn't think about that too much because \"I'm so smart.\" So a ba'al ga'avah attributes everything to himself, and the anav again, the yegiah v'amal, the need to work hard, the need for working assiduously, that's my achievement, but everything else about the equation is all from Hashem. Now that being the case, so again we asked, how do... How do the biggest rabbanim pasken life and death sheilos? Why isn't that gaavah? Because they have an acute self-perception. They know how much they know. They know how much they know in relation to other people. And what makes them not gaavah is that they know there's nothing self-congratulatory about that. They're not giving themselves a pat on the back for that. They're not attributing that to their own koach or otzem yadam. They're attributing that to the gifts Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave them, the abilities Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave them, the opportunities Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave them, the Siyata Dishmaya Hakadosh Baruch Hu has given them, the very life and existence Hakadosh Baruch Hu has given them. And because of that, that's why they don't brag. That's why they don't act in a boastful manner because they don't feel that there's anything to brag or be boastful about. Similarly, a rav can say, yes, I think Hakadosh Baruch Hu has given me the gifts. He doesn't have to say this about himself, he feels this about himself, that Hakadosh Baruch Hu has given me the gifts and I can be involved in Kavod HaTorah, I can engage in these conversations with people, and it seems overwhelmingly likely that I'll be able to influence them and they won't be able to influence me. How is, let's say, a rebbi supposed to balance Kavod HaTorah and not being self-congratulatory? I've heard stories of rebbeim introducing themselves as their full name without their rabbinic title. Is that not bizul Kavod HaTorah even though it's not, I see that it could be viewed as a contradiction to the self-congratulatory and not bragging. At times, there can be a tension. At times. I'm not sure of that particular case, depending on who you're talking to or how much of a bizul it actually is. It can be a balancing act. In that case, is there not a lack of self-perception? No, Rav Elyashiv pasken the most chamurdig sheilos. But if he can't introduce himself as rav, meaning is that not a lack of Kavod HaTorah? People knew who he was. They didn't even have to say, this is Yosef Shalom Elyashiv. He'd pasken a sheilah. If they didn't know, they wouldn't be convinced by him saying that. So what's the big deal? Okay, let's move on to another point in another mishnah. Mishnah Yud-Daled, you have it here on the sheet? It's not in the big print, it's in the small font. Mishnah Yud-Daled, you see it? Hu hayah omer. This is still Hillel, right? The same Hillel who was talking in Mishnah Yud-Beis is still talking in Mishnah Yud-Daled. אם אין אני לי מי לי. What does that mean? If I am not for myself, if I'm not for me, if I'm not for myself, who is for myself? וכשאני לעצמי מה אני. Even when I am for myself, what am I? ואם לא עכשיו אימתי. Okay, so what does אם אין אני לי מי לי? That sounds like Hillel's saying look out for number one in life, right? That's what it sounds like, right? You've got to look out for yourself first. So what is Hillel driving at? You can't help anybody else if you're not in a position to. That's an absolute truth, that's an absolute truth. I think many of us have this rush to help others, to contribute, to grow, and it's responsibility on top of responsibility. So let's read the Rabbeinu Yonah, please. You have the sheet, read the Rabbeinu Yonah. So if I am not for myself I won't again rebuke but if I won't engage in tokhacha for myself to that I should exhort myself to to fulfill mitzvos then if I can't do it then who will be the one to give tokhacha to me? If I don't mean it I'll go to the Mussar Shmues. I don't have to I'll go to the Mussar Shmues I'll go to the Mussar Seder I'll go to the Mussar Shmues. What do you mean by that? So so Rabbeinu Yonah continues כי זריזות קניית המוסר because of the ki zerizus because I heard from others when others come to exhort you and others come to give you tokhacha lefi sha'ah it's good temporarily lefi sha'ah it's good temporarily אבל כשיעורר האדם את עצמו בכל יום ויום each and every day yosif beyirato it adds to his thoughts and yosif beyiras Hashem
ולא תשתכח מלפניו כאשר ידוע לחכמי המוסר והנה נכתום העניין הזה
and it won't be forgotten before him as well-known to those who know that's the right path the right path that a person should take. And so Rabbeinu Yonah in Shaarei Teshuva let's just flip over page 20 Shaarei Teshuva so then Rabbeinu Yonah in Shaarei Teshuva also towards the end of mishnah הנה נחתום העניין הזה so we'll conclude this discussion במאמר נפלא מרבותינו חכמי ישראל כה היה הלל אומר with a maamar nifla as it were from Chachmei Yisrael Hillel used to say
אם אין אני לי מי לי וכאשר אני לעצמי מה אני ואם לא עכשיו אימתי ביאור הדבר אם האדם לא יעורר את עצמו מאן יעורר המוסר
the explanation of the matter if a person doesn't awaken himself of what value what will the mussar accomplish for him?
כי אף על פי שייכנס המוסר בליבו ביום שומעו הדרשה של שחרית
you've had the best drasha in the world the most inspirational drasha in the world אף על פי שייכנס המוסר בליבו I look at these lines such a fundamental principle for life אף על פי שייכנס המוסר בליבו ביום שומעו even though what you hear in that drasha of Shacharis it does penetrate however if that's all we do if I just go to the Shacharis drasha and I passively hear this emphasis so inspirational so impactful and then that's it and that's where the story and everything beyond that. So what's the next chapter says Rabbeinu Yonah at the end of line 3 ישכחהו היצר ויעבירנו מליבו it wears off that best Shacharis drasha the best drasha at the tish and at the time it's so powerful and the person feels it but gradually as time elapses the experience weakens and weakens until there's nothing left. So what does that mean? Does that mean that there's no value in going to the tish? Is there no value in hearing the Shacharis drasha? Is that the takeaway from what Rabbeinu Yonah is saying? So what is the takeaway? The takeaway is that yes you have to use the mussar that you hear around you to help inspire you and for you to do the right thing. So take a look exactly. So let's see please inside the Sha'arei Teshuvah of Rabbenu Yonah. Sha'arei Teshuvah of Rabbenu Yonah says in Sha'ar Alef, Ot Chaf Heh:
והנה על בן אדם להישמע מדברי המוסר ולהורר נפשו בלשון הדברים ולהתבונן ולהתפחד.
A person needs to hear the mussar, and certainly to awaken when he hears the mussar. But Sha'ar HaMussar, what a person- no, a person should go to the shul for the drasha, he should go to the Tashlich or for the drasha, but not remain passive. Then he needs to take it and he needs to follow up. That's what it all means, אם אין אני לי מי לי. No one's gonna- right? You've all heard the- it's a cliché, but clichés are sometimes true, that's why they become clichés. No one's gonna change you, no one can change you, a person changes himself. And that's what Hillel said, אם אין אני לי מי לי. The best shofar drasha in the world, the best drasha in the world, what that can eventually be is inside of me. And then I must actively follow up by reviewing in my mind every day, day after day, week after week, month after month, because it's always on my mind, so then it changes my behavior and I internalize it. But if I only- so I need to get that inspiration, I need to hear that drasha, I do need to hear that mussar, but then I have to take ownership over them, then I have to become actively follow up and internalize it for yourself. So what אם אין אני לי מי לי means, that a person has to actively, proactively follow up. And proactively following up means two things. Number one, Rabbenu Yonah says לשום הדברים על לבו ולהשיבם אל לבו תמיד. There's a difference between something you hear once and something you replay in your mind every day, days, weeks, months on end. The difference is you hear it once and you know it. If you hear it every day, day in, day out, day by day, week by week, month by month, you not only know it, but you feel it, it becomes internalized, and once it's internalized, it changes behavior. So that's one thing it means to proactively follow up on that tremendous drasha Shalosh Seudos. But it means something else also. Let's take a look at the last source. Can somebody read for us the last source? Tanya d'Bei Eliyahu. Midrash Rabbah, Parshas Nazir, Parshas Sotah, and Parshas Naso. Parshas Naso, excellent. So right after Parshas Sotah comes Parshas Naso. So why did the Torah place those next to each other? Why did the Torah juxtapose it? So Rebbe says, someone who sees the- someone who sees the degradation of the sotah, of the woman who committed adultery and then she drinks the mei sotah and this gruesome death. So we're assuming that what led her to sin was that she became intoxicated, and when people are intoxicated then their inhibitions, you know, go away, and that's what lured her into sin. If a person sees sotah b'kilkula, what he should go do is go take a nezer nezirus. So the Sfas Emes says an unbelievable, unbelievable comment on this Rashi. He says, I would have thought the exact opposite. If there's one person in the world who doesn't need a nezer nezirus, it's the person who has seen the sotah b'kilkula. Because remember what when the so it took I've taken a lot of education a decade ago many decades ago. So they showed us, they showed us films, and they showed us pictures of 17-year-olds. I grew up in Massachusetts. In Massachusetts you get your license when you're 16 and a half. So they had pictures of 16-year-old kids, 17-year-old kids, 18-year-old kids who didn't celebrate their 19th birthday, or their 18th birthday, or their 17th birthday, because they drove irresponsibly. They played funky music high and they speeded, and it was intended to deliver a message, you have to drive responsibly, it's not a game, not a game, you have to drive responsibly. But the ma'aseh of the Shem MiShmuel says is you can see those pictures, you can see the Sotah in her kilkulah, and that experience wears off. It wears off. The moment he sees the Sotah in her kilkulah, he can never imagine touching a drop of wine or partying in his life. A week passes, so that memory begins to fade. A month passes, it's faded a lot. And several months, he can't see it at all that he ever had that experience. So says the Shem MiShmuel, what can we do to avoid that happening? When you have the experience, consolidate it. Be mekabel upon yourself, how am I gonna incorporate this insight, this lesson, this inspiration into my life? Translate it into concrete measures. Okay, so in this case, the Hazal illustrate the Nazir, but obviously the principle is much broader than that. So when we hear a gevaldig drasha at Shalosh Seudos, a gevaldig drasha of the Pesh, or any other occasion, so A, like Rebbe Yona said, maybe repeat that drasha, replay that drasha in your mind every day for the next year. But B, right away, right after Shalosh Seudos, ask yourself, okay, how am I going to translate that? What am I going to do as a result? And if you do that, so then while you're feeling the full effect of that experience, so then you're mekabel. Now the kabbalah has to be realistic, it can't be too ambitious, it has to be realistically ambitious. But be mekabel, be mekabel upon yourself and that way you'll hold on to it. Okay, so we'll continue.