Mishlei 1:14-15: Terrible is Still Terrible Even in Small Measures

Good morning Rabosai, I hope everyone's well. Pasuk Yud-Daled: גורלך תפיל בתוכנו כיס אחד יהיה לכולנו. The Gaon explains: goralcha tapil besocheinu, cast your lot with us, literally amongst us. הוא נגד העובר על האדם בביתו והרגמו. That refers to the, again, of the four scenarios of gneiva, the one where they attack, ambush a person in his home and kill him. ואז שוללים כל מה שבביתו, then they plunder everything, they clean out the house. וחולקים ביניהם על ידי גורל. So when there's a breaking and entering in a house, so it's not just the cash that a person has on his person, but it's all the all the valuables in the house. And therefore, well, who's going to get the silver and who's going to get the computer and who's going to, so וחולקים ביניהם על ידי גורל, so they cast lots. That's why the goralcha tapil besocheinu is refers to this scenario. אבל לשולל על הדרך, but when the gneiva is perpetrated when a victim is outside of his house, when he's traveling or something of that sort, eino rak mamon, so a person doesn't travel with his silver and doesn't travel with whatever he has at home. ולא שייך גורל בממון, there's no lots as to who gets the silver and who gets the couch. Velachen pituyam kan, so then the inducement is בחלוקת כל מה שבבית, goralcha tapil besocheinu. However,

כיס אחד יהיה לכולנו הוא נגד העובר על הבתים לשלול שלול בלבד.

Those who ambush, but they don't intend on killing the person, they intend on ransacking the house but not killing the person. I'm sorry, one second.

אבל לשולל על הדרך אינו רק ממון ולא שייך גורל בממון. ולכן פיתויים כאן בחלוקת כל מה שבבית,

but when you're again dealing with a scenario where they attack and ambush a person in his own home, so then the inducement to join them is goralcha tapil besocheinu.

כיס אחד יהיה לכולנו הוא נגד העוברים על הבתים לשלול שלול בלבד.

Those who ambush, but they don't intend on killing the person, they intend on ransacking the house but not killing the person, but lehanyicho bachayim. Now when that's the case, וזה בקל יכול לדרוש, so the victim survives the assault and he may be, you know, on the lookout to regain his stolen possessions,

כי הוא בביתו ובחיים. וגם אותם העוברים אי אפשר שיהיו ממקום רחוק,

right, generally it's a local job. ולכן אי אפשר להם לחלק עדיין, right, I think it's called when people steal and the items are still hot. So when they steal and the items are still hot, so initially you just have to sort of lie low before you can before you can try to distribute it and before you can try to go out and sell it and use it. ולכן אי אפשר להם לחלק עדיין. So therefore they're not in a position yet to divide the spoils. Velizeh pituyam, so the way what they offer to try to induce someone to join them is שכיס אחד יהיה לכולנו. You know, you'll collectively we'll own the spoils from the home. בני אל תלך בדרך אתם מנע רגלך מנתיבתם. Don't go on this road with them, moreover you should even avoid going on any of their paths. בני אל תלך בדרך אתם מנע רגלך מנתיבתם, klomar lo mibaya, right, not only is it necessary she-al telech baderech. What's the difference between derech and nesiv? Shehu haderech hagadol. Highway, a main road is a Derech Chevron is not a little narrow street. It's a major, it's a major, major road in Yerushalayim, Derech Chevron. שהוא הדרך הגדול עצמו שהם דורכים והולכים בו ואתם. So not only should you avoid the ta'usa lereisa of A, that you're going on the derech hagadol and what's more, you're actually joining forces with them, you're going with them, ela, what's necessary is mena raglecha even bifne atzmecha, even alone, af belohem, so even belo ha'itam, mena raglecha, and what's more, not only midarkam but even minesivosem haketanim from their small paths שמהם באים לדרך הגדול. And then the gaon spells out for us that the mashal, the nimshal for the nasiv and the derech is היינו מהדברים המביאים לידי זה. So this is a very big, very big yesod. Sometimes the way we can best appreciate what's so wrong and what's so amiss about something is to sort of see what the worst-case scenario is. משל למה הדבר דומה, משל למה הדבר דומה. From the best way to understand the dangers of alcohol is to look at a case, to see a case, I don't know, maybe rachmana litzlan, a film of a drunk driver who kills someone, kills himself. And what that allows a person to understand is not only that I shouldn't get so drunk that I would do that, but that lets him recognize that if enough of that is so toxic that it kills others and oneself, then that's not something I want in smaller quantities either. So working back from that mashal, let's see it in a Rambam and then we'll see it again with what the gaon is telling us, that's what Shlomo Hamelech is telling us. If you have on hand a Rambam Hilchos De'os, take a look in פרק ו' הלכה ח'. פרק ו' הלכה ח' rabosai. המוכיח את חברו תחילה if a person is being mekayem the mitzvah of הוכח תוכיח את עמיתך. He's giving words of reproach, of rebuke. לא ידבר לו קשות עד שיחלימנו. A person shouldn't speak so harshly that he humiliates the other person. שנאמר ולא תשא עליו חטא, right, הוכח תוכיח את עמיתך and then the next phrase in the chumash is ולא תשא עליו חטא, which I think means that in being mochiach, you gufo shouldn't be sinning against them. כך אמרו חכמים יכול את מוכיחו ופניו משתנות? Maybe the norm for giving tochacha is that the tochacha is so strong, is so harsh, that the person's face, the color is going to change in his face, maybe he's going to turn deeply red, maybe he's going to turn totally white.

תלמוד לומר ולא תשא עליו חטא. מכאן שאסור לאדם להכלים את ישראל.

From here From here you see that it's assur to humiliate someone, vekol shekein berabbim, and certainly to do it publicly. אף על פי שהמכלים את חברו אינו לוקה, it's a לאו שאין בו מעשה. Oven gadol hu. Meaning even though generally in other contexts, the Rambam explains this in Perek Hamishnayos in Avos, one can look to the onesh of the cheit as a gauge and indicator of how chomer the cheit is. And generally that is true, but the Rambam says but it's not always true. And therefore in this context don't be misled by the absence of malkus to say well, eating neveilah is gor gefelach. Humiliating someone is not, it's not the most wonderful thing in the world, but you know, how bad can it be? You don't even get malkus. So says the Rambam, no, that, that system of indicators isn't intended to work all the time.

אף על פי שהמכלים את חברו אינו לוקה, עון גדול הוא. כך אמרו חכמים המלבין פני חברו ברבים אין לו חלק לעולם הבא.

Lefichach, let's pay careful attention to this lefichach rabosai.

צריך אדם להזהר בדבר זה שלא לבייש חברו ברבים בין קטן בין גדול.

Therefore a person has to be careful. I don't understand here. Because because אין לו חלק לעולם הבא a person has to be careful? But if I knew I wasn't going to lose my חלק לעולם הבא so then there would be no need to be so careful? You know after all the downside's not so great. You know my olam haba's not on the line so how careful do I need to be? That's what it means? The lefichach is because because the onesh is so chomer that אין לו חלק לעולם הבא? Ella mai, it's clear the pshat in the Rambam is like this. In the beginning of the halacha the Rambam is talking about lehachlim. And then he shifts to levayesh. Right? Initially he's talking about

לא ידבר לו קשות עד שיחלימנו מכאן שאסור לאדם להכלים את ישראל אף על פי שהמכלים את חברו.

And then it says שלא יבוש ולא יכלם. Then the Rambam switches to צריך אדם להזהר בדבר זה שלא לבייש חברו ברבים. So what's the pshat? So the pshat is as follows: lehachlim means something much more intense. Maybe humiliate is an apt translation. Levayesh is something not as intense. Maybe embarrass, right? Embarrass and humiliate have different connotations, right? To humiliate certainly suggests something which is much more intense and much more extreme than levayesh. Oh, so now we understand. The Rambam says when you see in the extreme how how the Torah tells us how awful humiliation is, so then from that a person should understand not only how awful humiliation is, but a person should understand that embarrassing is also awful. And when one sees the how terrible, how awful, how toxic something is in its extreme, it's also a way not only of recognizing the nature of the extreme but also appreciating just how bad it is in even in a more moderate, less extreme fashion. If you look at an x-ray of the lung of a smoker and and you see the damage that chain smoking does, so even leaving aside the potential for addiction, it should make us understand that one cigarette is also very bad. When you see a clear... With catastrophic results, it should make us understand not only how terrible shikrusah shel Lot is and how terrible drunk driving is, it should make us understand how terrible a kiddush club is and how gratuitously how one drink is also wrong if it's not Shabbos wine on if it's not the wine for kiddush on Shabbos or some such carefully defined, very carefully defined mitzvah context. Sometimes, sometimes, you know, when you when you go to the when you go to the doctor, in order for the doctor to recognize, ich veis, whether you have a cavity in your tooth, whether you have an infection somewhere in the body, he has to magnify the picture. But with magnification, it's not the pshat, oh, well, you know, when this will be, when this will grow to be as big as the magnification that I just did in the picture, you'll have a problem. No, the magnification shows that there's a problem even when something is is small. And and that's basically what what it says here in the Gaon as well, that, you know, when you think about the derech, when you think about the armed robbery, that they go on a derech for armed robbery, and and you see where that approach and where that lifestyle, how it culminates, so then the proper reaction is not only to abstain from אל תלך בדרך אתם, but the proper reaction is m'na raglecha m'nisivasam. No, even even when he tells you a kuntz of how to avoid paying sales tax. Okay, maybe we'll we'll stop here for now. So בלי נדר אם ירצה השם we'll continue with Avos at 11:30. I apologize, but Sunday morning, again, there's not going to be a 9:00 shiur Sunday morning. בלי נדר אם ירצה השם, again today as usual 11:30, Sunday also בלי נדר אם ירצה השם at 12:00 as usual, but but there will be no no 9:00 Sunday morning. Okay, rabosai, everyone should have a good productive morning. Be well. Be safe. Rebbe? Yeah, sure. Why does the Rambam say that

המלבין פני חברו ברבים אין לו חלק לעולם הבא לפיכך צריך להזהר?

Shouldn't he have said shouldn't the quote from Chazal been המלבין פני חברו ברבים אין לו חלק לעולם הבא and then we would say לפיכך? Well, I think machlim and malbin are more or less the same in the sense that they refer to the humiliation, and mevayesh is embarrassment which is, you know, less extreme than humiliation, but the malbin and machlim are basically the same. Rebbe? Yes, one more question. Why is it davka berabbim, by the way, just levayesh berabbim? Why doesn't it just say levayesh stam? Because that would lead to המלבין פני חברו ברבים I guess is so bad, but maybe we should even extend it all the way to back, just being mevayesh in general is bad. It does. The reason the Rambam stipulates berabbim is so let's ask an additional question. If you go back to halacha ches of

המוכיח את חברו בתחילה לא ידבר לו קשות עד שיכלימנו,

why not say in light of the difference we're recognizing between yachlimenu and yevayshenu, so you should say לא ידבר לו עד שיביישנו? Why are we conceding that? So the answer is that no matter how appropriately and and Even when one has all the appropriate sensitivity in giving tochacha, tochacha is embarrassing. When you point out to me that I'm doing something wrong, it's embarrassing, no matter how appropriately you do it, and no matter how sensitively you do it, I'm gonna be embarrassed. So therefore you can't say in giving tochacha, make sure you don't embarrass the person, because that's a contradiction in terms. It has to happen. What you can say is, but tochacha doesn't have to include humiliation. It can't avoid entirely embarrassment, but it can avoid humiliation. And that's why also when the Rambam, given that this halacha is introduced in the context of tochacha, the punchline can't be don't ever embarrass a person even in private because there will be times when that's warranted, because the only way you can fulfill the mitzvah of tochacha for me is by embarrassing me. You don't have to do that in public, and it doesn't have to be humiliation.